Grass Blooms Year After Year

In fact, it is not be. The ever-growing grass will always accompany the ever-growing soul. The love, hatred and hatred in the previous life have nothing to do with them. What is now is the purest.

My mood is quite complicated... I can't say it's wrong. Giving up your lover for the sake of the country is not wrong, but feeling unwilling to be abandoned is even less wrong. I don't understand what the mentality of scolding is.

Although I feel that if I put it on myself, I would agree with Xiao Shou's sacrifice for justice, and I think it's not wrong, and I shouldn't even be able to evaluate whether such values ​​are right or wrong. However, I understand the feeling of being fucked up by everyone, and I understand what the goddess is complaining about. I can only say that those who ask others to accept the so-called righteousness without any reason, and generously forgive each other no matter what the other person's mistakes, really don't think this is the behavior of a holy mother bitch? Why is it wrong not to forgive those who have been hurt? Weakness may be sad but it should not be wrong. Who wants to be bald if you have hair? If you are strong enough, I will make you cry all seven of you! I also saw complaints about the goddess Wen Xiaoguan why she attacked, why can't she attack? If you are weak, don't you chirp? If you don't accept it, don't look at it. Who begged you to look at it? It's pretty good. You can't accept it cheaply. Well... Xiao Gong, if you don't cry, stand up and masturbate! Come on, goddess!

It was very sad and heartbreaking to watch. I am very satisfied with this ending. This ending is the best for Xiao Gong, right?

This ending is pretty good

Two I met Chu Yun when I was thirteen. I couldn't even eat before that night because the madam wanted to sell me to an ugly businessman. I hid behind the screen and listened to them discussing the price. Qingguan always wanted to sell it more expensive, but my appearance was not considered a good asset, so I kept asking the merchants to drop a hundred taels of silver. The madam was probably very upset. After the man left, he picked me up like a stupid chicken. She dug into my flesh with her sharp nails dyed red, and told me in a perfunctory manner what I should pay attention to. I nodded, and finally heard her scold: "You lose money." I didn't dare to talk back, but a weak fire ignited in my heart, and uncontrollable emotions surged into my throat. I suppressed it and rolled around. In the end, I just bowed my head humbly: "It's the cold smoke that's not good." When I was young at that time, I was still a little ignorant. Later, the ghosts in the mass graves made me understand that all bad things must be found within myself. Chu Hanyan is a person who is born with sins. Among the thousands of sins, there is always one that will be the source of others' anger. According to their theory, I think the flames at that time were just because of shame. I was ashamed that my appearance was rough and that I could not make enough money for the madam. At night, the fire was still burning, and I sat in front of the mirror wearing a fancy and ridiculous gauze dress, and my reddish eyes were reflected in the bronze mirror. The rouge box exudes a smoky smell. I think of the bargaining session between the madam and the merchant, where a person was transformed into an object with money. "This child has never bloomed" "But his appearance is not the best" "Pretty enough, not to mention he is obedient" "The charm is not enough, the price is too high" You said to me, repeated clearly, I curled my lips in front of the mirror, the shadow of the candle swayed, and fell on my eyebrows like a dim flower. I stretched out my hand to touch there, my skin and flesh were involved, my eyelashes moved, and tears rolled down my face. According to the theory of the lonely souls in mass graves, it was probably because of shame, but to this day I still don't understand what the tears were for. I sat on the edge of the bed, combing and playing with the thin tassels in my hands. I heard the chirping of cicadas outside the window, but soon it was suppressed by the cicada next door. I twisted the tassels between my fingers and suddenly heard the creak of the wooden door. The door was pushed open, and I didn't dare to look up until the businessman came to me with a strong smell of alcohol. One hand lifted my chin. It was a little rough, but the fingers were unexpectedly long and beautiful. I obeyed and raised my head and saw Chu Yun. At that time, I didn't know that his name was Chu Yun, or that he was the rumored young general with flying spirits. I just think this person is really good-looking, and the brothers in the same building are different in their good-looking appearance. He pressed my lips and rubbed them slowly with his fingertips: "Why are you so young..." I knew he had gone to the wrong room, but I didn't want him to look for anyone else at this time. Secretly, I wanted him to stay here for a little longer, so I pretended to be familiar with him and kissed his fingertips, saying vaguely, "Master, do you want to regret it?" He hugged me playfully, and his arms were so warm that I fell in love with him almost instantly. I heard my rapid heartbeat, and I hugged him back in a daze, my left chest touching his right chest, and the tremors became more restless. He lifted up the hair on my cheeks, and the warmth fell on my neck, moving down inch by inch. I don't know what I was thinking, but when I thought of that ugly businessman, I had the idea of ​​​​escape—probably because he was too stingy and made the madam angry. The young master in front of me is the only shortcut I can take. I abandon my shame and cling to him. Only in this way can the madam make enough money. According to the principles of lonely souls, looking back on the past, I think so now. The lotus-colored tent was filled with the scent of powder. I stared at the tent ceiling, anxiously waiting for his next move. His lips and tongue wandering around my neck paused for a moment. I felt my body sink, and he fell asleep with his eyes closed. I pushed him away carefully, but I was just afraid that the merchant would push the door open and come in. How would I smooth things over after that? I sat up and pulled the gauze apart, leaving red pinch marks on my body deliberately, like a thief. After I finished doing it, I quickly lay down and looked at the gauze curtain all night long. The next day was still peaceful, and no merchants came in. It turns out that the madam drank too much at the banquet and was confused and arranged the wrong room. She complained that the waiter next door's moans last night had a hint of struggle. That waiter was the top material, but now that his innocence was compromised by that merchant, he always felt resentful. By some strange combination of circumstances, the merchants did not come to me, but the madam was a little unhappy. However, the handsome young man who had been sleeping all night was willing to rescue me, redeemed my body neatly, and took me to his mansion. Later, I had the courage to confess what happened that night, but he just smiled casually: "I know, how can it be true that the marks on my body are so evenly pinched?" I regard him as a god more and more. He told me that his name was Chu Yun and asked me to take his surname as Chu. I happily agreed, like an animal begging for mercy, flattered but unable to resist pushing further. I listened to him making tea and chatting with his friends. Sometimes he couldn't even understand a popular allusion, so he had to retreat with a dull smile. Occasionally, he would notice my embarrassment and squeeze my hand to comfort me, but that would only make me feel more sad. I always knew that he and I were different, but I wasn't sad because of the difference. I was used to being humble. I was sold to a brothel when I was a child. I didn't like poetry and books, and I only knew how to play and sing erotic songs. Even so, I couldn't do my best. My appearance is not as good as the red card in the pavilion, but I am not going to be reduced to the lowest prostitute. For thirteen years, I have always been semi-embarrassed, and my name has a bit of Leng Yuhanhan's bad luck. I know all this and accept my fate. I am a disgraced person who fails to live up to expectations, but I don't want him to suffer malicious rumors from others because of my failure to live up to expectations. While walking in the garden, I heard his friends lamenting behind his back that his eyes were becoming more and more funny, and that he actually doted on an illiterate husband. Then they talked about his bad qualities, and they also included allusions that I couldn't quite understand. It turned out that the friends who were drinking and having fun on the surface had a different look behind their backs. I hid behind the pillar and wanted to pull them out one by one and bring them in front of him. He was so good, how could he suffer such unwarranted criticism? Gradually, I no longer always stayed by his side. Whenever those people came over, I had to quickly retreat behind the screen, looking through a hidden hole to watch his back as he toasted and laughed without knowing anything. I am willing to live in his back. Like a strange species among moths, it yearns for fire and respects fire, but dare not really pounce on it. I hid in every dark place, watching him dance with his gun in the morning and read at night. Occasionally he would notice me, but I didn't know anything. I didn't even have the strength to swing a light sword well. When I was grinding ink, I always splashed ink dots on his sleeves clumsily. He was not angry at all, he just squeezed my palm and coaxed me to say it was just a small matter and told me not to take it to heart. His thoughtfulness only made me more aware of my own unbearability, so I shed tears under the flickering candlelight, dizzying his neat handwriting. Chu Yun hated to see me cry, so he wiped my tears clumsily, but he only knew to say "don't cry" and "don't cry." From his jerky attitude, I realized that he was also a weak person, so he laughed, sincerely for the first time. The first time I had sex with him was when I was fourteen. He is Chu Yun, whom I admire, and he is also a general respected by the whole country. I have never understood the important matters of the family and the country. I only vaguely know that the world is beginning to be unstable and that he will go to the front line to lead troops. That night I put on his favorite clothes and sat by the bed waiting for him. He was obviously surprised when he saw me. I drank wine beforehand to strengthen my courage. I don't know whether it was because I was ashamed or drunk, but my face felt hot. I took the initiative to hug his neck and breathed in his ear: "Master, please leave Han Yan to think about it, okay?" Chu Yun trembled obviously, and he stroked my hair: "You are still young." I rubbed his neck and laughed out loud unexpectedly: "When the young master saw Han Yan for the first time, Han Yan was obviously smaller." He let go of me and looked over with his dark eyes: "At that time, I only wanted a night of love, but now I just want to be together." The white heads are united. How could such a heavy word be placed on a humble boy? I was so embarrassed by it that I could only stare at him blankly for a while. He came closer and kissed me softly on the lips. I grabbed his hand and refused to let him leave. Almost stubbornly, I heard my trembling voice: "Han Yan has grown up, Han Yan is willing." For a long time, just close to each other, so long that tears fell one after another, and he finally responded to me: "Okay." (After being harmonized, Han Yan is attacking Han Yan is attacking Han Yan is attacking!) His pale and painful face was deeply imprinted on my heart. I sat up and hugged his trembling body, asking, "Why?" Chu Yun did not answer, but used difficult movements to dispel my doubts. When it was over, I hugged him and fell asleep. Everything was like a dream. I was defiling him and the god I admired in my heart. I was terrified and at the same time very happy. Everything tonight gave me undue thoughts that I shouldn't have, so I asked him again: "Why are you treating me like this? I'm not the prettiest, I don't know anything, I'll only drag you down, I lied to you, why did you buy me back, why are you willing to be so nice to me..." He was silent, thinking very carefully, then looked into my eyes and said, "I don't know either, but every time I see your fearful and cautious eyes, I always want to bring everything to your side." I only saw his silent eyes, the sound of the wind, the chirping of birds and insects, the faint glow of the burning candle, and the shadows of the trees moving under the moon. Everything was inaudible and invisible, only his words and his eyes. I fell into an extreme ecstasy, which was mixed with extreme fear. He is actually willing to love me, and he loves me regardless of the reason. I should repay him with the same amount of love, but it is far from enough - it is me who condescends to him and taints him. So I said: "Young Master, feel free to accept the challenge. Han Yan is waiting for you here, and you will have to wait as long as you want." I originally wanted to go with him, but then I thought about my own worthlessness and following him would be just dragging him down. I was ashamed of my own uselessness, and began to feel depressed again. He gently caressed my cheek and said, "If you can't wait until you come back, you can find someone to settle down with. I don't have a family, so I don't have to worry about anyone bullying you. I left the money in that place. You know that place. If war comes over, just go as far away as possible, the further away the better." "No." I felt that at this moment, I was filled with abundant strength, so I spoke out, "Han Yan will not leave, Young Master, Young Master is Han Yan's hero!" He kissed my forehead and made an oath that was sincere and touching: "As long as I live, I will protect you, and I will protect you for the rest of my life." Another moment of Yiyi. The next day I said goodbye to him and watched his shadow fading away. He turned around on horseback and waved to me. He was wearing silver armor and a silver gun, like a god above the nine heavens. His eyes passed through the crowd and looked at me from a distance. The waiting time was very long. I always stayed in the courtyard where he practiced martial arts, basking in the sun from early morning to noon, barely eating and sleeping. I began to pay attention to the battle situation ahead. In the mansion and in the market, I wrote real and fake letters together. While I prayed for him, I almost paranoidly told myself that he would not lose. He is the unparalleled hero in my heart, my hero, my hero. He should be respected by tens of thousands of people, so how could he lose. My almost ignorant enthusiasm was not wrong. He certainly lived up to expectations. As I heard more and more praises for him, I suddenly realized a spine-chilling possibility. He is my Chu Yun, and he is also the general of the people, the general of the saints, and the general of the country, the country, and the country. What will happen to him if one day... Perhaps it was to fulfill my long-awaited sigh, and soon I got the answer. Although ghosts don't know pain, whenever I think of that day, my whole body will curl up inch by inch due to severe pain. My eyes, my ears, my limbs, one by one... I feel sad. It is a familiar feeling, like a flame leaping up, but it is hotter and bigger than any other time. It is like a karmic fire burning into the sky. The lonely souls in the mass grave warned me that I should not be sad. I have nothing to complain about. I was born to be sacrificed. I have always listened to their words and never refuted them. But this time, there was a faint voice telling me that I should not believe them. Okay, let's continue. That day I went out to inquire about him. When I returned home, it was a little late. There were no people on the road. People were always panic-stricken due to the war, and the streets were deserted. It was autumn at that time, and the leaves all over the city made a crunching sound under my feet. I suddenly thought of him and thought it would be good to have him with me at this time. I rubbed my hands and suddenly heard another sound of trampling on leaves. I looked back and saw a few blurry shadows. I wanted to escape, but it was too late. Something heavy hit the back of my neck. I felt my body falling into a pile of dead leaves, and the dust was very pungent. When I woke up, I was in a strange tent. I tried to escape but was quickly caught back. Gradually, I gave up. During this period, someone came to see me. It was a strange face. The man looked at me doubtfully and muttered: "Then Chu Yun, do you really treat him like a treasure?" Three or four days later, the man came over again, took a pen and paper and asked me to write a letter: "If you want to go back alive, write to your lover that you are captured and ask him to save you." I vaguely understood something. They wanted to threaten Chu Yun, and I shouldn't be a burden to him. But more deeply, I didn't want to die. So I wrote the letter, and at the man's request, I put the jade pendant he gave me into the letter, waiting for his reply. Before he left, the man glanced at me disdainfully and muttered for me to hear clearly: "He who came from a prostitute is quite easy to handle." I just lowered my head and pretended not to know. I've been waiting for a long time, but still haven't been released. The man seemed to be getting impatient and ordered the guard to cut off a strand of my hair, but again there was no response. The man became more and more irritable, and I knew he couldn't wait any longer. This time he cut off my hands. Before this, I was filled with ridiculous self-confidence. I was confident that Chu Yun would come to save me. He is my hero. He said he would protect me all his life. He rescued me from there. He liked me, he would save me, and he would not abandon me. It hurts to cut off both hands, since the fingers are connected to the heart, let alone cutting off the palms so neatly. I always like to cry, but it was so painful at that time that I couldn't squeeze out tears for some reason. But I was still waiting for him, and that ridiculous self-confidence had never completely faded. My body became crippled bit by bit, my self-confidence was bit by bit worn away by time, and the man's patience was bit by bit worn away by the war situation. Numbly, I looked at the irritable man outside the tent with my only remaining eye. The man seemed to have noticed. He came closer, with the hysterical light of a trapped animal in his eyes. He looked at me and sighed: "I underestimated General Chu. He is a real general. You and I will come to the end." I laughed with him, a foolish child's smile. I didn't know what I was laughing at. I just felt that everything was far away, and my soul seemed to be pulled away, floating and looking down. I saw a weak monster that was ugly and mutilated and could not even be called a human being. The monster kept grinning with its mouth wide open. It laughed until its stomach ached and choked with laughter, but it could not shed tears. The man looked at me with pity. It was strange that such a cruel man could show pity. He said, "This is the last time. Do you have anything to tell him?" I thought hard for a while, still smiling funny: "I don't know, just say that I don't know what to say. For the last time, please dig out my heart. I look so ugly and it's hard to live." He agreed. I watched the blade cut open the skin on my chest as if I was relieved. I vaguely remembered that Chu Yun liked to kiss my heart. Listening to my rapid heartbeat, I remembered what he said about white heads uniting with one heart. I remembered the high-spirited look of his silver armor and silver gun. He walked through thousands of people, waved to me attentively, and allowed me to return. I finally understood that my hero is also the hero of the people, the hero of the saint, and the hero of the country and the country. He loves me, but what comes before me is the world and righteousness. Am I extraordinarily stupid to ask him to sacrifice his righteousness to save me? Alas, young master, why are you crying? This is my story. I am not crying. Why should you cry? Later? Later, my body was thrown in the wilderness, where there were many disobedient prisoners of war, mostly Chu Yun's former subordinates, and some innocent people. More and more people are dying, and this place has become a world where ghosts are free. The ghosts in the mass grave all loved him very much and did not allow others to say anything bad about him, because he was a hero of his family and country. I told them that I was very sad, but they said that I was guilty. I did not commit suicide immediately, but allowed the enemy to threaten me. It was a heinous crime... So many people said this, and I was convinced that I was guilty. Later, seven or eight years later, travelers passed by during the day. We heard them say that Chu Yun won the battle, but refused the reward from the Holy One, and committed suicide at home only one month later. When I knew it, I just felt that inexplicable smile coming back, so I couldn't help laughing, but I still couldn't cry. The ghosts saw it and said that I was unforgivable. I usually listen to what they say. I know I shouldn't laugh at that time, but I couldn't bear it. I choked on my laughter and couldn't stop, as if I was stunned. Sir, do you think it's strange or not?

Protecting the country can be called justice, and protecting one's loved ones can also be called justice. Justice is never the only thing. To give up is to give up, no reason is needed to decorate it. Never giving up can be righteous, just as willing sacrifice is nothing but self-deception. It is a sin to be weak, and it is also a sin to abandon others, because the value of life has nothing to do with quantity and is equal.

Second brush, cry to death, seems sad but not sad

How should I put it... Actually I don't feel bad for Gong going from one extreme to another. I don't like this kind of character, but the capitalization is very good.

I'm crying to death, I'm crying to death