[Gintama] Rules for Keeping

This story was originally titled The Gintama Diary. Here are the most important pinned sections of the care guide: 1. Remember to feed the rabbit enough, at regular intervals. It has a huge appetite, so don't forget. 2. You must groom the rabbit often and tell it that it is the most important thing in its caretaker's life and will never be abandoned. Otherwise, the whole house will have to be renovated and everything replaced. 3. Don't try to shut the rabbit out. For consequences, see Rule 2. 4. Don't praise anyone other than the rabbit. For consequences, see Rule 3. P.S. The rabbit is a rare mutant breed. Since the direction of its mutation is unknown, don't be surprised if anything seems unusual. [How can something so vicious still be a rabbit? That's not a rabbit, it's a prehistoric monster! Flips table! P.P.S. The rabbit is a lifelong pet. Shipping is free, but returns and exchanges are not accepted, dear~ [Damn it! I want a refund!] The Normal Blurb [Is it really normal?] Who says rabbits don't eat the grass by their burrow? I'll chew on one just to show you. It was practically served up to me, so it'd be rude to refuse, right? [The poor grass by the burrow roars: Die! You mutant rabbit!] The KUSO Blurb [You know too much.] To put it simply, this is the story of a vicious, mutant goofball rabbit devouring the grass by his burrow who raised him. [A load of nonsense... Is it really that simple?] One-Sentence Blurb [The one above is a sentence too. Enough already!] A righteous young man's miserable tale of raising rabbits and getting rich. [Did something weird just sneak in there? Don't let the stuff above fool you. Actually, this is just a cheerful story about a mutant, split-personality goofball rabbit managing to get the grass by his burrow into his mouth. Reader's guide: This story is the product of unrestrained silliness and absurdity. Please bring your own Lambo-style shock-resistance buffs. If your resistance is still too low, make a beeline for the emergency exit in the top right corner. This isn't the story of Shinsuke, the god of rabbits. It's about Kamui's cousin, Shinye, a split-personality mutant goofball who is still, at heart, a well-behaved young man who doesn't need an umbrella. Theme: