My Deskmate Bullies Me Because I Can't Talk Back

Just read it as a brainless story!

[Please add my upcoming book to your favorites: "There's Not a Single Decent Person in Your Sect!" Blurb at the very bottom.]

When the students were reshuffled into classes for their second year of high school, Ke Shen and his new deskmate, Xu Zhihe, became enemies on the very first day.

He had aphasia. Every word had to be rolled around in his throat again and again before he could force it out. He stuttered so badly he sounded like a faulty radio, so he rarely spoke. If he could write it, he wouldn't say it; if he could nod, he wouldn't open his mouth.

Xu Zhihe was the exception.

-

Xu Zhihe was a devilishly unpredictable guy with a deeply divided personality.

He had a unique persona of his own.

He took out his different-colored eye in P.E. class and let Ke Shen play with it.

Taking advantage of their homeroom teacher's instructions, he gave Ke Shen all kinds of sentences to say every day, demanding that he make them sound fluent.

When he finally realized his feelings, he secretly opened the voice recordings he'd saved for ages and stitched them together into an audio clip, listening to it over and over late at night. During the day, he pretended nothing was going on while trying to coax Ke Shen into saying the specially prepared sentences.

After confirming his feelings, he used the alcohol in his system as an excuse to corner Ke Shen in the bathroom and ask him to date.

Afraid of scaring him, he suggested that he pursue him first.

And so began the long road to winning over his deskmate.

Bonus scene:

Xu Zhihe hummed in acknowledgment, pulled a stack of printed papers titled "Ke Shen's Training Manual" from under his desk, and set them in front of him.

Ke Shen froze. Then his face turned a riot of colors, going from green to purple and then every shade in between. When he saw that it was authored by Zhao Xiaosong, his expression went completely blank.

He was so angry he didn't want to speak. He quickly signed: "What's this?"

Xu Zhihe said, "Old Zhao gave it to me. You were asleep, so he asked me to give it to you."

Ke Shen clicked his tongue and signed irritably, "What is it for? What even is this training manual?"

Xu Zhihe said, "No idea. Read it yourself."

Ke Shen gave an "Oh," and flipped through the manual. It was packed with words, classical poems, literary Chinese, and passages from the Dao De Jing. At the very end, he found a note with Old Zhao's handwriting.

2.

Most of the students had piles of books on their desks, and Ke Shen was no exception.

Xu Zhihe turned his head. "What are you looking at?"

Ke Shen was caught red-handed, but answered with righteous indignation, "L-l-l-looking, looking, lo..."

Xu Zhihe cut him off. "Sure. Since you called me Uncle, I'll let you look for one class period."

Ke Shen's expression darkened. "You w-w-want to f-f-fight?"

Two little souls in distress find comfort in each other and tend to each other's wounds.

Ke Shen, who has aphasia x Xu Zhihe, blind in his right eye and deaf in his left ear

Reader's guide:

No logic.

Three updates a day or six a week after signing a contract (heart hands).

If it's not your thing, please don't flame me. Mind your words.

"There's Not a Single Decent Person in Your Sect!"

Blurb:

Du Qingyi transmigrates into a book, becoming the frail, beautiful, wicked elder who commits every kind of evil in the original story and is destined to be hacked to pieces by the male lead.

The System thoughtfully provides a plotline to help him stay alive. There's just one bug: he forgets it as soon as he turns away. He sees something, looks away for a moment, and his brain automatically resets to factory settings.

Du Qingyi decides to lie flat and spend every day being pampered by his little padded-jacket apprentice, Ju Wu.

But the more he lies flat, the more things seem off.

The whole sect's gaze gradually shifts from sympathy to awe, and rumors spread through the cultivation world: That sickly elder from Fuyun Sect, the one who looks like a gust of wind could knock him over, has managed to dupe the entire cultivation world all by himself.

Du Qingyi shyly scratches his head and says, "Oh, no. I did it all for the disciples of Fuyun Sect."

But things keep getting stranger. Du Qingyi leads Fuyun Sect in a contest against outsiders, and afterward things get even stranger.

He leads disciples from the major sects in a showdown with cultivators from Dongying. Win, and your name goes into the family records. Lose, and your family gets investigated for three generations.

His convenient, warmhearted little padded-jacket apprentice, Ju Wu, serves his master tea, water, and medicine, and fans him during the day. At night, he kneels by the bed and watches over the person he treasures most.

Everyone outside Fuyun Sect says, "That child's got good roots, but he's stuck with a sickly, pretty-boy master who's all looks and no substance."

Only Ju Wu knows what he feels for Du Qingyi.

The first thing Ju Wu does each morning is suppress his indescribable feelings, then turn to his master in bed and smile gently. "Master, the medicine's ready. Drink it while it's hot."

Du Qingyi doesn't notice a thing. As he drinks, he thinks, It takes a thousand days to raise a kid, and one day to put him to use. I'm glad I took this apprentice.

Until one day, Du Qingyi's System crashes.

The System's final mechanical voice sounds in his mind: [Because you have forgotten the plot for so long, the System is about to self-destruct. Thank you for freeloading. Goodbye forever.]

Du Qingyi is so angry he nearly vomits blood on the spot. And after he begins to vaguely sense his convenient, warmhearted little padded-jacket apprentice's feelings for him, he avoids the other man as if he were the plague.

Du Qingyi looks down and meets his apprentice's harmless-looking face. Suddenly, he realizes something: He's raised this rebellious disciple for three years, making sure he grew up decent and upright, only for his roots to turn crooked and his shoots to turn black. And now the boy is clinging to his side, impossible to pry away.

Ju Wu's eyes redden as he kneels and tugs at Du Qingyi's hem. "Master, could you please stop avoiding me?"

Du Qingyi: "…"

Later, after Du Qingyi and his disciple become cultivation partners, the major sects point at Fuyun Sect with knowing looks and shout, "We knew it! There's not a single decent person in your sect!"

Frailly beautiful master x convenient, affectionate little padded-jacket apprentice who's not what he seems

Content warnings:

1. Not traditional, serious cultivation.

2. Absurd comedy.

3. The System appears very rarely.

Theme: Study hard