[A top who really has no root x a Pixiu bottom who really has no butt]
Li Yunxiu, worshipped by the Three Realms, wakes up having forgotten his past. Apart from the body of a six- or seven-year-old child, all he has left is a pain that pierces him to the bone.
He wanders through the forest, hungry and hurting. Just as he's about to burn the wretched place to the ground, he runs into a dignified, richly dressed man.
People say the man is the Grand Eunuch, the Nine-Thousand-Year-Old.
In a childish voice, Li Yunxiu says, "Nine thousand years old? You're still a young man."
The man raises his eyes and smiles, then takes him aboard a flying boat.
After Li Yunxiu boards, the flying boat falls into chaos. Gold objects are stolen, spirit stones disappear, and even the Nine-Thousand-Year-Old's Kunlun jade fan vanishes. Li Yunxiu hears this, rubs his belly, lets out a satisfied burp from all the Kunlun jade he's eaten, and goes back to sleep.
The food aboard the flying boat is so good that his body grows at a speed far beyond that of ordinary people. When he realizes he won't be able to hide it much longer, Li Yunxiu runs off. But once he's out, it proves incredibly hard to find a decent meal. His spiritual power hasn't recovered, and he can't fight or steal his way to food. Eventually, he makes such a commotion trying to get a meal that he's hauled in front of the Nine-Thousand-Year-Old.
The Nine-Thousand-Year-Old waves a new jade fan in front of Li Yunxiu, making his eyes light up. With a soft laugh, he asks, "Divine Lord, would you like it?"
Li Yunxiu raises his chin haughtily. "Since you offer it of your own accord, present it to me."
"You've eaten so much of my food for free already, Divine Lord. If you want more from now on, you'll have to pay with something."
Li Yunxiu gives a cold snort. In less than three days, the palace is in uproar, with thefts happening one after another. Even the imperial seal goes missing.
Wearing long boots, Li Yunxiu lounges against the Nine-Thousand-Year-Old's gold-threaded quilt, biting the imperial seal like a piece of candy with a crunch. When he sees the Nine-Thousand-Year-Old hurrying over, he opens his mouth wide and swallows the seal right in front of him.
"I ask that Divine Lord return the imperial seal."
Li Yunxiu grins wickedly, plucks a luminous pearl from the bed, and pops it into his mouth too.
"I am a Pixiu. Things go in, but never out."
[The top really has none of that, and neither does the bottom. The author just has a twisted sense of humor.]
[They love to fight, and they fight hard.]
[The top isn't some perfect nice guy, and the bottom isn't some perfect nice beast. They're not good people, but the author is. Characters' actions do not represent the author's views.]
Theme: Be kind to others and enjoy a happy life!
