Help! The Beloved Concubine System Bound Itself to My Pig-Slaughtering Father by Mistake

On the eve of our family's confiscation, I managed to get a [System for Winning Over the Most Beautiful Imperial Consort].

All I had to do was achieve conquest of Xiao Lin, the regent, and I could escape the death penalty.

Then a bolt of lightning came from the heavens, and the System got struck off course.

It bound itself to my butcher father, Shen Dachui, who stood nine feet tall and had a full beard!

System: [Host, please stumble bashfully in front of the regent and reveal your shoulder.]

I looked at my father's bear-like back, gritted my teeth, and tore his coarse hemp shirt to shreds.

The next day on the Imperial Avenue, my father tripped and smashed the regent's eight-man sedan chair to pieces.

In a voice like a temple bell, he tugged coquettishly at the black hair on his chest. "Your Highness, I slipped~"

The regent's hand trembled so badly as he gripped his sword that it was like a sieve.

Then I shoved my father into the residence of my sworn enemy, Grand Tutor Xie Huai'an, to earn points.

The regent, who had severe germophobia and insomnia, started climbing over my family's wall every night.

He gripped my waist hard, gritting his teeth. "Tell your father to stay away! Tonight, I'm settling the score with you alone!"