A Washed-Up Celebrity Reads Fortunes, and Now the Whole Internet Wants Me to Become a God

Chu Yan, a fully maxed-out grandmaster from the cultivation world, opens his eyes to find himself a broke, debt-ridden celebrity hated across the internet.

Faced with a sky-high contract penalty, the grandmaster promptly picks up a nine-yuan, free-shipping marker and starts drawing talismans and telling fortunes!

Who knew these crappy talismans could do more than protect him? They could also turn a top actor into his personal ATM?!

Rumor has it that Chu Yan, the entertainment industry’s number-one pretty face, can’t act and loves throwing himself at people.

That is, until he signs up for a paranormal variety show that nobody else dares to join…

Other idols when they see a ghost: Scream! Run! Mom, save me!

Grandmaster Chu when he sees a ghost: He pulls out a calculator. “Your forehead is dark. You’ll suffer a bloody disaster within three days. Pay to avert it. That’ll be a hundred thousand.”

A hundred-year-old ghost in red grabs him by the throat. Instead of dodging, he takes the ghost’s hand. “Medical malpractice dispute, right? I get it. I’ll help you file a police report.” The ghost bursts into tears of gratitude on the spot.

He even casually draws an “Evil-Warding Talisman” and sells it to a fellow cast member for five hundred thousand.

Online haters: This script is so fake! Boycott this has-been!

And then

A famous director begs him for feng shui advice;

a wealthy socialite throws ten million at him to catch her cheating husband (and catch a dried corpse);

even Shen Qi, the aloof, celibate, and famously virtuous three-time award-winning actor, knocks on his door in the middle of the night.

Shen Qi offers up all his assets and a black card, his gaze deep and serious. “Master Chu, can you read my fortune in love? Tell me if we’re compatible.”

Chu Yan looks at Shen Qi’s extraordinary purple aura, the kind that could send him straight to ascension, and swallows. “We’re compatible! I’ll take this reading!”

From being mocked across the internet to becoming a “living ancestor” worshipped by world leaders.

Chu Yan says, “Honestly, I haven’t done much. The fortune-telling business is just really profitable.”