I Accidentally Bound Myself to a Female Billionaire and Was Forced to Represent Earth in Battle

"Lin Ji, male, extremely dangerous, with a ten-billion bounty! Shoot on sight!" Staring at the wanted posters plastered all over the streets, Lin Ji is stunned. He'd just helped Earth recover the lithography machine blueprints. He'd only meant to grab a discounted bento from the convenience store, but accidentally bundled up the undercover richest woman in the country and transmigrated straight to a trial before the Galactic Council! Facing the guns of an alien fleet numbering in the billions, with Earth on the verge of destruction, the "bandit" Lin Ji adjusts his gold-rimmed glasses and activates the [Strongest Diplomatic Fury System]. "We'll punish you no matter how far away you are? No, we'll roast you no matter how far away you are!" From then on, everything goes off the rails. Across the stars, he's a mad-dog diplomat, verbally sparring with every faction and roasting the gods until they suffer brain hemorrhages, while selling Earth's spicy snack sticks to barter for a two-dimensional foil! On Earth, he's a phantom thief, fleeing across the world with the richest woman in the country while casually tossing two pieces of black technology to the government. As the alien fleet closes in and the whole world despairs, Lin Ji removes his mask and stands atop the United Nations building. "Hey, you! Bring up my planet-destroying cannon!" The whole internet erupts: "All clear! That's no bandit, that's our planet's daddy!"