Honghuang: Rahu, You Sneaky Bastard

Luo Hou dies and transmigrates into Luo Hu. By this point, he has already founded the Heavenly Demon Realm, with the Eight Great Demon Kings and Four Great Demon Generals under his command. Stop Pangu from splitting the heavens and earth? If you’re my brother, come chop me down! Sell off the entire Heavenly Demon Realm and become colleagues with the Heavenly Dao. Stir up trouble among the Dragon, Phoenix, and Qilin Clans? I’m not doing that. Prove the Dao through slaughter? Not necessary. Fight Hongjun to the death? No, there’s no need. Luo Hu, you sly bastard, what did you do to Changxi and Xihe! Luo Hu, you sly bastard, what did you do to Nuwa! Luo Hu, you sly bastard, what did you do to Houtu and Xuanming! Luo Hu, you sly bastard, what did you do to the Queen Mother of the West! Yuanfeng, Kong Xuan, quick, call me Dad! Nuwa, Xuandu, quick, call me Dad! Fairy Yunhua, Erlang, quick, call me Dad! Lady Yin, Nezha, quick, call me Dad! How about I go by Li Jing in this life? Or should I go by Yang Tianyou this time? Maybe I’ll be emperor this life. Yin Shou sure had it pretty good. The Calamity of Creation? If you’re my brother, come chop me down! The Calamity of Ferocious Beasts? They’re our pets. Why are we fighting? The Dragon-Han Tribulation? You dared hurt my wife. You’re dead! The Witch-Demon Tribulation? You all carry on fighting. I’m here to pick up my wife. The Great Calamity of Investiture? Forget it, forget it. We’re all one big family. Why fight? The Great Calamity of the Journey to the West? Erm, the West had already risen to prominence long ago! You think I’m the Ancestor of the Devil Dao, but I’m actually the Primordial World’s top nanny. But… what I really want is to be a carefree drifter!