Three Kingdoms: A Gatehouse Soldier Working Nine to Five in Cao Cao's Camp

"Chancellor, it's bad! Lü Bu has seized the opportunity to attack Puyang. Yanzhou is in danger!"

"Ding Yuan is guarding Puyang's gates. Don't worry."

"Ma Chao is outside the city, greeting you and your family with a string of four obscenities."

"Where's my brother-in-law?"

"It's a quarter past five. The city gate commandant clocked out ages ago!"

"We'll fight again tomorrow!"

"He says tomorrow starts his weekend, and he's absolutely refusing to work overtime."

Cao Cao: I'm afraid the Cao family won't be able to hold on to this realm!

Liu Bei: Damn him! He abducted my beautiful White Jade concubine!

Sun Quan: Please don't cross the river. I'll gladly offer you my sister-in-law Da Qiao, Bu Lianshi, and my younger sister Sun Shangxiang!

On the eve of unifying the realm,

Ding Yuan looked at Cao Pi. "Keep struggling. My army is all outside, and I've already exhumed and mutilated Sima Yi's corpse. Uncle, you've served us so well. Why shouldn't you sit on the Dragon Throne?"

This novel and its characters are entirely fictional. Any resemblance is purely coincidental. Do not imitate.