Siheyuan: From the Start, I Take Pills and Terrify the Whole Courtyard

The moment Xu Damao transmigrates, Silly Zhu has him tied to a tree, where he freezes all night. He wakes up with no idea what's going on, but the System arrives first. The newbie gift pack becomes life energy and saves his life. Once the points shop opens, it offers all kinds of things, from ten-yuan bills and bicycle coupons to physique-enhancing solution. The problem is, he doesn't read the instructions and guzzles five liters of topical medicine like a drink. His whole body burns like hot coals, so he can only run into the middle courtyard in weather below minus ten degrees and douse himself with cold water.

The whole courtyard erupts. Second Aunt thinks he's gone crazy, First Aunt anxiously calls a doctor, and Jia Zhangshi curses him for indecent behavior and threatens to call the police. Xu Damao keeps pouring water over himself and drinking it. In the end, he takes off his shirt and exposes his pale body, making all the women in the courtyard cover their faces and scream. Most absurd of all, the color of his mouth keeps changing, cycling through red, orange, yellow, and green. It scares Bang Geng into wetting himself, nearly sends the Deaf Old Lady to her grave, and makes Silly Zhu and Yi Zhonghai so furious that they form an alliance on the spot to hold a courtyard-wide denunciation meeting.

But Xu Damao doesn't care. He's squatting in his room, mixing up a bucket of something new: fish soup, milk, brown sugar, and ink, ready to deliver it to Jia Zhangshi as a nourishing tonic.

This novel and its characters are entirely fictional. Any resemblance to real people or events is purely coincidental. Please do not imitate.