The Origin of Qingming

Long ago, Napoleon said, “A soldier who doesn’t want to become a general is no good soldier.” Much later, Su Jian said, “A graduate student who doesn’t want to become an academician is no good student.” From master’s student to academician, it’s just one word’s difference. Some people spend their whole lives striving for it, yet it remains forever out of reach. Industrial wastewater? Piece of cake. Put this device in the drain, and the problem is solved at once. Air pollution? You call that a problem? Install the universal absorption plates I invented in the smokestacks, and they’ll remove 100 percent of the pollutants! The greenhouse effect? Just send the excess carbon dioxide and methane to Mars!