The Heart Light Is Always Bright

I was fourteen years old that year, and the ice on the edge of Langya Well did not melt at noon. I squatted down and pressed the back of my hand against the ice. The ice melted with my body temperature and made a pit. There were my fingerprints in the pit. Later I heard about what happened in Xuzhou - Cao Cao massacred the city and all of Surabaya turned red. The map was spread out on the desk, and I dropped a drop of ink on the location of Xuzhou. The ink spot stayed there for seven days, getting lighter day by day, and finally disappeared completely. Many years later, I stood on a high slope outside Xuzhou City and saw three black horses killing a boy. Three knives - splitting the neck, breaking the wrist, and piercing the throat. The sound of the knife cutting into the bone was like stepping on a dead branch. The three horses went south. I turned around and hid in the woods, with nothing in my hands. Later I picked up a fan in Longzhong. The fan bone is made of paulownia wood, and there is a knot in the middle part, and a dent was made by pressing it with the thumb. The person who handed me the fan said, "You can use it later." Her fingertips were cooler than mine. When I took the fan, the indentation of the fan bone was just embedded in my thumbprint. I sat in front of the desk and rolled up the map and then rolled it up again. The lamp flame flickered for a while and then came back straight. The late emperor said on the couch in Yong'an Palace, "Help me finish the walk." When he let go of his hand, I didn't let it fall. Later, I knelt in the five-foot-long original tent, released my hands, palms facing up, and a few grains of very fine dust leaked out between my fingers. The lights went on. The wind came from the northwest and never stopped. After the soil from Dingjun Mountain covered everything, the wind was still blowing.