The Focalors Familia Begins in DanMachi

The first book is the one I read the most, close to 300 chapters, with 3,700 fan points. It features a Black Tower, but in your writing, the Black Tower is limited by materials. Sisikar, born a spider, a spider that only survives for 29 days, the creator of Phase Flame and Phase Transformation technology, accelerated the development of the entire spider civilization by thousands of years.

After the main character summons them, whether it's Fryna, Robin, or Tifa, they all feel like high-end 3D custom-made suits, or other creatures with the appearance and names of these characters that I initially liked the most.

The protagonist's talent affects everyone in the dungeon, not only because the monsters they fight already benefit others, but also because other people can use the artifacts. It's really annoying.

This author has his old problem: the settings are all novel, but he just loves to go overboard. The early parts were alright, but in the later parts, he likes to add a bunch of nonsensical additions. The Holy Grail War in the first book was one example, and in this one, he introduces a character with sentient ley lines, and then suddenly a puppet of the protagonist wipes out Loki's Familia, leaving only a few of the main members. What is he trying to express with this absurd writing style?

The plot after the appearance of the young master is written inexplicably, and there is even a scene where the protagonist's clone kills Loki's Familia, leaving only the main characters. Is this a plot written with a butt?

As the title suggests, even with Ota's powerful skills, the protagonist's clone couldn't defeat him in a head-on fight. The clone possesses all of the protagonist's magical abilities and is even more skilled. Meanwhile, our protagonist has been quietly acting as a camera and commentator for over ten chapters, watching his teammates feed due to information asymmetry. The protagonist is just too overpowered! 😅

Robin

I hope your book can rival "Wrong Place, Starting from Picking Up an Elf Girl," since your action scenes are decent, but please don't turn it into a camera. When recruiting female characters, look for those with big breasts, and don't have too many female characters.

Chapter 264 begins the story of Loki's Familia, where they fight against the suddenly appearing young master. How many chapters have they fought? Then, in the middle of the fight, a clone imitating the protagonist suddenly appears. What does this mean? Did the protagonist die in the dungeon and then start imitating him...?

Seeing that the latest chapter even features monsters from the Roaring Tide is truly unbelievable. Doesn't the author understand how fierce the battle between the two sides is? You've piggybacked on Genshin Impact's title and then added Roaring Tide content inside; are you trying to grab traffic from both? I hope you don't ruin your own career. 😅