Sword of Lihuo

The advantages are that the world view is well designed, the imagination space for plot development is large, and the writing is relatively delicate; The disadvantages are also obvious. The twenty chapters pave the way for what a complete world view means - almost half of the space is devoted to settings, and the setting explanations are almost all based on the protagonist's past life memories, which are not well integrated with the story. In the latest chapter, when Lapis's early image was not pleasing to the eye, awakening Lapis disrupted the protagonist's subsequent plans. This turning point may be a lightning point for some readers (Additional: Originally, I didn't think the protagonist's portrayal inherited the dregs of Amber Flow: the duality of "internet-addicted boy-fictional character licking dogs", but the repeated emphasis on the gaze of the Green Moon Goddess in the new chapter made me suffer from PTSD) To sum up, it is a fantasy novel that has the potential to become a fine product, but the author is still relatively immature in terms of business writing. I hope the test results will be better.

I can't stand it. The first point is because the name is almost the same as my brother's. The second point is that the beginning is poorly written. It smells of an inexplicable literary youth disease, and it feels like moaning for no reason.

To write a story, to write a grand story, don't imitate the author and endlessly show off your understanding of the plot. It's really annoying. If you look at the Titans, you start from a little kid when you enter the game, upgrade step by step, and join the Survey Corps. As the story progresses, you expand your knowledge and understanding of the world, instead of giving you a bunch of lectures first. The reason why countless authors on Qidian are third-rate authors is that they always want to describe the grand worldview they think they have in their minds, and never care whether the readers can understand it or not, and they just keep nagging like an old lady. There is nothing wrong with the author's writing style and description, it's pretty good. That is, I don't have a clear understanding of the overall structure, story outline, and its own advantages and characteristics. I have always felt that the key to a good work, no matter what, is always the story and immersion, and everything else is the foundation to assist these. You must learn to do subtraction. After eliminating all unnecessary and verbose things, what is left is the key point. Then focus on the key content to enhance the rationality and logic of the key point and add flesh and blood to it, instead of repeatedly beating useless nonsense.

I caught up with the latest, and the poison test is completed. Two words, long-winded. The author's ability to advance the story is not very good, and the word count is at the max. For example, in Chapter 27, there are six people on the opposite side. The author can think of the Transfiguration Technique, and the Transfiguration Technique can be associated with the location of the entire area. When thinking about the location, he can think about what the adventurers came here to talk about, what kind of magic has penetrated here, and then think about the church's efforts to repair this place, and then continue to think about the evil elements coming here to destroy it. . . . . . Wait and continue to think about it, my God, you can't think about it with such a number of water words. I was really impressed that six people could talk so much.

Hundreds of thousands of words, but you won't be promoted to level one, are you serious?

The main line is unknown. The most dangerous time for this kind of subject is when the first crisis is over and there is no way to start a new crisis. What is the protagonist doing after leading the team out of danger? He didn't seek to strengthen himself, nor did he change jobs, and play house with the adventure troupe of dancers. The long preparation for the world-ending crisis was all in vain. Either the crises hit one after another, or one crisis continues to press until the completion of the book, and there is nothing to write about development, so I have to write about daily life. Isn't it just a moment of relaxation, and then burying myself in a pile of trouble that will never come back? It's understandable to occasionally have a transitional chapter. I really feel like I have subscribed too much when I put it on the shelves.

After reading and marking eight chapters, the author seems to be a typical "amateur" whose writing style is very "rough", full of "wordy settings", and some of the language is casual and "under-polished", which is often seen in fantasy areas, especially. However, it can be seen from the eight chapters that the author is an "amateur" with some talent and thoughtfulness. The settings are comprehensive and detailed, bringing an epic framework, and his literary quality should not be that bad. Therefore, even if the quality control of some parts of the writing is mixed, the overall sense of rhythm is naturally acceptable, and some details are very appealing. In short, in my opinion, this is a potential book with better quality than the 90% formulaic novels in the fantasy area of ​​Qidian today. Come on, author.

This is not the era of Amber Sword. Now if you write Amber style, if you still want to be the licking dog of the game character, then you will definitely drive away a large number of people!

I hope it won't be poisonous. The biggest poisonous point of the amber stream is to be a licking dog, licking virtual characters desperately. In today's social environment, if you dare to write like this, it will explode.

70% Of a chapter is a straightforward introduction to the setting, and 30% is about realistic development, which looks like expository writing.

The dog-licking game from another world is coming again

Recommended for those who are looking for depression and those who like the drama of being alive.

I have to say that the text control shown in the chapter "The Rite of God's Choice" is much stronger than before, and multiple lines are parallel without any confusion. If this paragraph can end perfectly, I feel like I can try to promote the book.

This book is too literary. A good novel is one that puts settings into the plot. This novel throws the plot into the setting. Half of the previous chapters are about what happens in the game, and most of them are settings that don't appear at all later. I also like to mention what will happen in the future, which is very dramatic.

Ignore the mean critics like the one below, come on

Investigation report: "Number"-469 Investigation target: "The Sword of Leather" - Male Protagonist - [Ion O'Claire] Investigation Result: [Soul Penetration] Judgment Basis: Abnormal Characteristics: Travel Investigator, As the name suggests, it is a profession that investigates and records the time-travel situations of travelers. It aims to let observers (that is, readers) in all worlds know the time-travel situations of travelers in this world in advance, and volunteers to provide observers with fast time-travel information inquiry services If there are any errors, Wan Wang hopes to correct them ——All Souls Feast Zhenjun Stay on December 5, 2025

Literary youth. Fighting literary youth is the biggest failure 😰

It's different. The Wandering Soul Sword next door is also very slow, but people are still going strong.

The author of Don't Die, as one of the rare Kohaku-ryu works with good writing, Don't Die Eunuch😭

Hold on to your monthly pass and don't die. It's hard to find fantasy books.

I'll give you the rest of the monthly pass, don't die

Hey, why are you dead♿️, buddy, please wake up.

You won't want it to be gone 😭

Rarely found food, has my book addiction become a bit of a problem just after I started it?

When will the vessel cultivated by the Clan of the Blood Clan go towards the divine fire?

My brain is broken, can anyone explain it?