My Humorous Adventure

First of all, let me say that my name is Jack and I am a thief, but I am a tasteful thief. Ordinary thieves steal from the poor, but I am a bastard who only steals for the rich. Ordinary thieves keep a low profile, but I insist on drinking all their red wine on the spot and tap dancing on their Persian rugs. Ordinary thieves are afraid of leaving evidence, but I deliberately ogle in front of the surveillance camera, and even help them adjust the camera angle to capture my handsome profile. The most important thing is that I have three iron rules: 1. I only steal from rich people whose money comes from shady sources; 2. I will do enough research before every action to ensure that the target deserves what he deserves; 3. Although I tease the women at home, it is only a verbal joke and never serious - I am a gentleman hooligan, thank you.