American Tour Guide: My Tourists Are Not Normal

Holm lives in America and works as a tour guide. As long as he looks after tourists from other worlds and earns five-star reviews, he can win all kinds of rewards. The problem is, the attractions are all pretty strange: Textile Mill No. 17, Dutti Wax Museum, Elm Street, Silent Hill, Crystal Lake, Mysterious Island, the White House... Seriously? Luckily, the tourists are just as strange: the Eight-Foot-Tall Lady, Van Helsing the werewolf, the megalodon, Puss in Boots, Tandelina, the Angry Birds, Godzilla... Well, that’s a relief. “My name is Homelander Anderson, and I’ll be your tour guide today. Please follow the rules. No killing, transforming, going berserk, and so on at the attractions. I also promise I won’t turn into a shady tour guide and rip you off. Van Helsing, put down your pneumatic crossbow. Jason is just a kid! Godzilla, could you please stop breathing atomic fire all over the place?” Seeing Godzilla still blasting the White House, Holm wasn’t bothered in the slightest. But as a tour guide, he had to at least look like he was doing something. So he pulled out the Analects of Lunjyu, turned into a hulking muscleman, and grabbed Godzilla to fling him aside. And that was how the Capitol Building collapsed. “I’m just the tour guide. If you want compensation, take it up with the tourists.”