League of Legends: This Player Doesn't Play by the Rules

“How long until the neutral monsters respawn?”

“100 seconds.”

“How long is a level-five hero's respawn timer?”

“22 seconds!”

“If you can answer all that, why ask me why I should enter the enemy jungle?”

Faced with the reporter's question, Li Zhixing burst out laughing.

“I've already cleared my jungle. Should I just lie around watching Douyin instead of going to theirs to hunt players?”

The LPL took it in stride:

“22 seconds is way less than 100. Makes perfect sense.”

“It's just elementary-school math! What's wrong with Director Li teaching and educating people?”

“Can't help it. You're not allowed to use your phone in pro matches.”

The LCK was in uproar:

“I thought Kkoma was right to kick him off the team. Turns out the coach was the biggest mole of all.”

“Director Li, hurry back to SKT! We sent Blank off in a dump truck.”

“Director Li's personality is what makes him great. We Guapi fans are all on our knees, begging you to come back!”

Kkoma told Korean media, “I regret how stubborn I was back then. Player Li Zhixing, please come back!”

As for Li Zhixing,

he had never liked playing by the rules, ever since his debut.

“That's a great move. It's mine now!”

When he left the LCK for the LPL, one saying spread throughout the entire region:

“A kid has joined the LPL. His Nidalee flies through the sky!”

[A meme-filled esports novel with no female lead.]