I, Yu Uchiha, Am Devoted to Cultivating Immortality

To fight four garbage sand ninjas, first he pretended to be injured by them and fell to the ground, then he lay on the ground and was kicked and couldn't hold back. It wasn't until the four of them got close together that he attacked and took down the enemy. Where is your illusion? Where is your Sharingan? What if you use a clone to take your place and get kicked? Do you want to see what the combat power was before? Three Magatama Sharingan. In an instant, the team was talking and laughing. Borrowing a little bit of natural energy can make Rika and Fugaku even, overpowering Setsuna. Easily defeat Nekoyu, the cat sage who healed his injuries. Create a bunch of particularly powerful training methods and chakra application methods. What about the opponent? An unknown jounin team, cannon fodder who talks and behaves like a gangster, and their boss is a loser who is so frightened by White Fang that his subordinates are not even allowed to mention White Fang's name.

I think the biggest obstacle to the protagonist's cultivation of immortality is the author's brain circuit, which likes to impose drama😰😰

The front part is not that good, but the idea of ​​Ninjutsu + Immortal Cultivation is not bad, at least I can watch it. After getting the golden elixir, I started to feel confused. I just joined a copycat Tarot Club with a mismatched temperament, and what I did was meaningless at all. The excitement of getting stronger before came to an abrupt end. If you still believe in cause and effect, it would be more efficient to create some natural disasters and then show miracles. What's the use of bringing in a few supporting characters? It's too intellectually and illogical. What's more important is that it's frustrating, boring, and very watery. I have fully subscribed to Chapter 218, and now I only feel sorry for the money I have. If the Shanzhai Tarot Society is disbanded in the future, please write it carefully. I hope there is a living Shen Nong who can call me.

The author has no idea what we want when we read the novel What we want to see is obviously to trample the bones of the princes in the street and burn the inner treasury to ashes. It is the nuclear bomb that was placed in Kunlun Mountains to destroy all the decay before we can be relieved. It is an international tragic song, and I am falling from the sky for my sake. He holds the power of killing in the world, killing evil and leaving the good to relieve the people. In the future, if Sui Ling Yunzhi is successful, he will dare to laugh at Huang Chao for not being his husband. What you wrote is so frustrating, I hope you can improve it.

The strength fluctuates high and low! Moreover, the tactical system was not set up well👌The flying thunder god was actually hit in the back. He must be mentally ill🧠

It's really hard to understand Before the age of 18, I was trained as a normal ninja. When I got the golden finger, I remembered the Taoist philosophy of my previous life and started to practice immortality. Moreover, he was expelled from the organization by his family and had to earn his own training resources. You pretend to agree that you feel aggrieved that the family defrauded spiritual practice resources? Why don't you practice Tongtian Dao even though you know that there are individual techniques? Even if you are exercising to lay the foundation, practicing steel boxing (without learning the same eight disciplines as the demon disintegration) is aggrieved? Are you so sure that you must have a golden finger and don't want to learn ninja skills? And the metal fragments found out of the pig bones Normal people are cautious about things of unknown origin. Even if they want to eat, they will find a way to break or even grind them into powder to try a small amount, or feed them to animals to see the reaction. The protagonist swallows them all in one bite, and then the protagonist's aura lives. The small fish fished out of the lake are also fried and then mixed with flour and medicinal herbs to make pancakes? Also made to look like dried fish? The qualifying standard is that fairy cats can eat normally. How many days will it take for ordinary cats to eat one piece? Will the protein deteriorate and lose nutrients after you fry it? Why not add a little bit of this fish to normal supplements to enhance the effect? Is it better to mix with flour than with tonic? Why does this measurement standard use the fairy cat as the standard and how many days does it take the ordinary ninja cat to eat? Why not use the Ninja Cat as the standard, and why can't the Immortal increase the dose? (A normal cat eats one piece, but you fairy cat can't eat four or five pieces?) And stuffing things into oneself Others stuff things into their bodies randomly (this protagonist also has it, that is, the metal piece that almost killed him when he ate it whole), This protagonist is even more awesome. He stuffed a thing that looked like Cthulhu into his inner world (was this done by humans?)

The protagonist accepts the injustice of the Third Hokage and does nothing, and constantly strengthens the Third Hokage's strength, which is quite unbearable.

Are Kirigakure ninjas refreshed by NPCs? 3,000 People died in the battle to land on the island, 5,000 or 6,000 people died in the sea surrounded by Konoha and Kumo ninjas, almost 3,000 people died in the civil war, and the number of casualties in multiple battles of the small ninja team who patrolled hard and avoided being discovered was probably a thousand people. Can this still have combat effectiveness? ? ? The village is almost wiped out.

You are the only one who builds the foundation. Does building the foundation also come with inner demons? Do you still have to suppress your inner demons all the time? The attack occurs within a few days after the suppression, and it begins to affect your mentality and actions. It is too early to set up your inner demon.

The biggest problem is that the protagonist's experience as a film police officer is probably not that of a TV series. Normal police station police officers don't have the time to take care of this.

Playing house politics. If you can't write well, don't write. Otherwise it would be really embarrassing to watch. Chapter seven or eight looks okay. The further back you look, the more awkward it becomes. The world of Naruto is an extremely awkward world with functions such as video recorders. And there are no special effects, just grab it and throw it to the tribe and let them figure out what to do. Isn't it too early to start a war at this stage? Not enough for the protagonist to improve his strength?

What are you writing? The more you write, the more rubbish you get.

One is that I don't understand cat slaves, and I feel perverted. The other is that the dear stinky brother and stupid sister in the novel made me so embarrassed that I almost got cancer 😰

I should say that the last few chapters have been written like shit! If you want to become an immortal, then you can become an immortal. What tricks are you playing to establish a divine court?

I can't stand it anymore after seeing Chapter 160. The reform of the military system itself is super poisonous, but it also suppresses combat effectiveness? A ninja whose main profession is cultivating immortality and whose secondary profession is a ninja has more chakra than Uzumaki, has a powerful system, and has considerable self-healing ability. He can master magic and fly thunder gods and fight three tails to escape death? The paper data of the secondary profession alone is stronger than that of the Second Hokage, not to mention the bonus of the main profession, and the assists of the Cat Sage. Shouldn't you be able to hit the three tails casually with one hand?

Ever since I wrote about the mysterious operation of placing something suspiciously like Cthulhu in my inner world, I started to suffer from mental loss and amnesia.

Objectively speaking, about 1/5 of the psychological changes and actions taken by the protagonist made me feel like "Why does he think so?" "Why did it develop like this?" To put it very bluntly, there is a lack of sufficient foreshadowing. If this book is purely about Naruto, it is completely beyond the scope. When writing about immortality based on Naruto's power system, many plot developments lack foreshadowing and become very abrupt. There are many abrupt places. Here are two examples: 1. Before the protagonist breaks through the golden elixir, he touches Goju Yagura. Somehow, he has to touch each other. The human tribulation mentioned in the book cannot be avoided. I feel that it is completely unconvincing to the readers. It's not that what you wrote doesn't make sense, it's okay if you write it this way, but it feels far-fetched to the reader, like a forced setting, which means there is a lack of sufficient foreshadowing. 2. Why are there three tails? One has wind in its eyes and the other has water in its eyes. The eyes can also condense something that can be eaten. After all, it's more than Naruto writing about cultivating immortals. It's okay for you to add letters and settings like this, but you lack enough foreshadowing. Most readers will feel that it's very abrupt that you suddenly pop up such a thing in Naruto's world view. For example, what is foreshadowing? Because of the protagonist's time travel, the protagonist felt some changes in the underlying logic of the world during his cultivation of immortality. Then as the protagonist was cultivating immortality, he discovered more changes through the perspective of immortal aura. At the same time, ordinary ninjas also discovered slight changes, but because they did not know the magic of immortality, they only felt it slightly, but did not care much about it.

He said that he could kill Ye Cang at will, but was he afraid that others would misunderstand him for killing this beautiful girl so decisively and that he was a pervert? He was afraid that others would regard him as a pervert and others would think that he would definitely die and would fight against him? ? ? ? ? Does the author dare to make some nonsense?

I wonder if the author is himself, does he have masochistic tendencies? The protagonist was kicked in the nose and face time and time again, and even took the initiative to get his face in for a beating.

It's too watery, and it's too holy. Being besieged by the third generation's leader will only kill the third generation and some of them. Even if they don't kill them all, they still have to carve a curse mark and use them as dogs.

It's okay if there are too many personal settings, but it's too cowardly and it suppresses your ability to fight, so just hold back. The rhythm of writing a book requires a rhythm. When you are restrained, you talk about how strong you are and what you will do in the future. When you need to be proud, you become cowardly again, haha.

The first hundred chapters are still acceptable. Breaking out of the chakra system and pursuing the path of cultivating immortals at least is not trying to be a fool. The thing that I personally don't accept during the Five Spirits Completion Stage is that each element has its own thinking. If I find out that I have a second personality, I will find a way to kill him as soon as possible, because you can't be sure when he will affect you and replace you. When it comes to the golden elixir stage, there are many flaws. First of all, the plot is dragging. Although it has the ability to push sideways, it insists on overpowering the protagonist's combat power. Secondly, in terms of practice, there is no clear goal in the Five Elements stage. Sometimes it is Shinto, sometimes Immortal, and it is about collecting beliefs. It also feels like the protagonist's mental space is a hodgepodge, with everything stuffed into it.

Why is it not feasible? In the final analysis, we don't understand enough. We don't understand anything about the Five Elements. Since we have already used the Five Elements, we shouldn't mix other theories (elements) into it. First make it clear that the five elements do not match the elements The "element" theory describes something similar to a refrigerator and a gas stove. The refrigerator is one element and the gas stove is another element. The refrigerator and the gas stove are not the same thing. Generally, there is no difference between the two. Convertible The "Five Elements" describe the five states in which matter operates. Take water as an example. When the material "water" is in a solid state, the five elements belong to gold. When ice melts into liquid water, the five elements belong to water. At this time, the five elements belong to water. When it evaporates, it flows like wind. The five elements belong to wood. The five elements can naturally be converted. Take the "natural energy" in the book as an example. Regardless of its attributes, natural energy is the same thing, that is, matter. The different attributes of the natural energy in the male protagonist are the different states of the operation of the substance "natural energy". The male protagonist's foundation building is like simulating the operation of the world. Each additional attribute is an additional simulated state. The "Element" theory and the "Five Elements" theory both try to describe how the world is composed and how it operates, but they are two different systems for explaining the world and cannot be mixed with each other. After all, the worldviews are different. Next time I write something like this, I'd better check more information. Chapter 61: Resignation 😰 I'll read the next one.

High emotional intelligence: The plot of this book still has a lot of room for improvement. Low EQ: What is written behind is like a shift. Is the originality of the author who writes Naruto fan fiction so outrageous? The white eye disease I saw in Uemoto became Wenqing disease. I have almost forgotten the plot of this book, Dragon Vein.

I don't know when, "IQ Online" became a dispensable label and the choice of a few authors I don't know when, looking at the choices of most authors, you came up with the idea of ​​writing yourself At every moment when inspiration strikes, you write down the creativity, looking forward to using this creativity to add to your own work Every time At a moment when you are not understood, you open your book and look at the protagonists and supporting characters, as if you have become them, and they have become your close friends And one day, you suddenly find this comment in the vast sea of books, and suddenly encounter this book, you may get a friend, get an understanding, and get some ideas...

Either the power of time is the protagonist's chance to make a comeback, he is the only one in his countless universes, how can you still do such a bad thing. Why don't you think the pressure on the protagonist is not high enough? You're such a pure abuser, I can't understand the point of you arranging this plot.

This book has too many personal items, one-third of which is the setting of cultivating immortals in the ninja world.

... This book is boring. I won't follow up on what I'm writing now. Goodbye.

The writing from 235 to 245 is very confusing. If you are not Shen Nong, just jump to it.

Shui , it seems like I haven't written anything in the past few months. I have been writing Dragon Veins for so long just to see a forcibly arranged accident. Goodbye in the world 🙏