The Dark-Faced Brash Immortal

I tried my best, but even after three attempts, the 388 screen still crashed. There's nothing I can do. 😭

Honestly, seeing someone cheated by their closest relatives, penniless, with only a doghouse to make things a little better, isn't that exactly what I'm talking about?

The writing is decent, and the plot flows smoothly, but it's not very popular. I can help get this book seen by more readers. My WeChat ID is yaayaa335.

The writing is both awful and awkward, with extremely abrupt scene transitions. A simple rescue scene is dragged out for three chapters, completely disrupting the reading flow.

It feels a bit like keeping a diary, lacking a strong narrative.

The first few chapters were a major obstacle to reading; the plot was disorganized and left me completely confused. It improved a lot later on, but some parts were still overly descriptive. Author, keep up the good work! Practice your writing style more.

I'm from the Writers' Academy. Well, how should I put it? I once wrote a novel entirely based on my own ideas, and it was a complete flop. Now, I can easily get a contract for an 8,000-word article. I've even created several alternate accounts. I've only read the first three chapters, and from what I can tell, there aren't any problems with the author's work.

The plot is good, and the writing is quite good too. The initial plot holes were also used effectively, which is nice. However, there are still some issues. You should consider the characters more; it would be better if you could think and write from their perspective. Keep it up, you did great! ヾ(❀╹◡╹)ﾉ~

I always see you recommending books on Writer Assistant, so I came to take a look. The book's concept is quite good; you should publish this kind of subject matter on Yuewen.

Brother, your language skills are problematic; it's really awkward to read.