The Sixth Round of Recording

I saw the advertisement and came to take a look. It was really miserable ✊

I only read one chapter and my time is limited. Let me talk about my own point of view. First of all, I have to say that the author's writing is very good, especially the opening chapter where the fat man hits the jade railing and uses the pork to fall on the chopping board is very appropriate. Although the beginning is dull, it is more delicate and not bad at all. However, when the time-travel plot is introduced later, it becomes a bit verbose. I glanced at these few pictures casually. There are many things that I can write first without rushing. For example, how to time-travel does not need to be too detailed. Nowadays, there are many kinds of time-travel. Who cares whether you are electric shock or lightning? The last thing is to get the mission. How should I put it, it's a good beginning, but there are no highlights. I know that your second chapter will introduce the plot, such as why Elder Lu appears. In fact, most readers can guess it, but it would be good if you put the highlight of why Elder Lu appears at the end of the first chapter. In other words, it is very attractive and can keep readers reading. Overall, it's actually not bad, but it doesn't quite fit the current environment. Just write it as a hobby, it's no big deal.

Change your profile, brother, your face is crackling