Prove It, Slime

I, Slime, will die today. I will die outside. Even if I jump from here, I will not even touch a girl... It smells so good! Hello everyone, my name is Mo Yu. When I first came to another world, my wish was just to be a slime that basks in the sun and brags every day, but things soon got out of control... Now I am hiding in a cave. Outside there are sword masters whose goal is to collect the most beautiful and fat girls from all over the world, gay priests with full muscles, and... In short, there is no normal person, but my firm and pure heart only has one goal of defeating the devil, and nothing can do it. To stop me, I raised 666 gold coins for this purpose, 600 to buy a sword, 60 to buy a shield, and 6 to buy a certain Jedi scientist's mysterious technology. Please believe me, I have never heard of any story about slimes and succubi, let alone half-price succubus hotels. Book club group: 489114163