The Third Prince Is Still Struggling to Survive Today

[Based on Investiture of the Gods, with a mix of mythology and folk legends]

[Exquisitely beautiful, peerless war god Zha x goofy, cheerful star lord Bing]

I, Ao Bing, am the third prince of the East Sea Dragon Palace.

In life, I was an unlucky dragon. I was even unluckier in death: a spear pierced my heart, and someone even ripped out my sinews.

The one who killed me was called Nezha.

Li Jing's third son, the general of Chentang Pass. His features were exquisite and beautiful, beyond compare, as if he had stepped out of a temple mural.

Who would have thought he'd be so vicious?

That day, I went to Chentang Pass to promote Heaven's "Golden Boys and Jade Girls Ascension Plan." To be precise, Chentang Pass would pay tribute to the East Sea each year with boys and girls, and the East Sea would help them ascend to Heaven and become immortals.

What a wonderful thing! It was a tremendous blessing.

Who knows how those ignorant fools spread the story, but they twisted a perfectly good ascension plan into "the Dragon King wants to eat children."

I went there full of joy to take up my post, and Nezha came in swinging.

And then...

Heaven took pity on me for being wrongfully killed, rebuilt my body, and appointed me Star Lord Huagai. In reality, I just do odd jobs, sitting in a wheelchair all day sorting files.

Yes, I can't stand up.

That's what happens to a dragon who loses his sinews.

Oh well. At least it's a proper divine post, and getting paid to do nothing isn't so bad.

-

On my first day at work, I ran right into him.

Nezha.

After the Investiture of the Gods War, he attained sainthood in the flesh and was appointed Marshal of the Central Altar, Grand Preceptor of the Heavens, Great God of the Three Altars and Seas... Any one of those titles puts him eight ranks above me.

According to Heaven's rules, when a low-ranking immortal encounters a high-ranking divine general, they must bow, or even kneel.

I couldn't stand it. I provoked him and picked fights, going to cause trouble in front of him every few days.

And every time, he pinned me to the ground and beat me up.

-

The entire heavenly court knows that Star Lord Huagai and Marshal of the Central Altar are sworn enemies, at each other's throats and never to be reconciled.

That's what I thought, too.

Maybe we'd spend this whole life hating each other.

Then one day, a System called "CP Matchmaking Express: Marriage Special" bound the two of us together, bringing several new wonders to the immortal realm.

Whenever my emotions fluctuate, I can't control myself from spouting love poems.

A perfectly scaled-down Nezha is connected to his real self's senses and emotions, and has an especially fiery temper.

The dignified Marshal of the Central Altar turns into a little dumpling every now and then.

I could put up with all that.

The worst part is that the System broadcasts our inner thoughts!

All my thoughts, like "Nezha, you damned bastard," were broadcast for everyone to hear.

Nezha heard them and laughed.

"You can call me a bastard, but don't say I'm damned. After all, I'm dead, and you'll have to 'die for love' too."

Me: ...

There's no way I can keep doing this job for even one more day.

[Reading Guide]

1. First-person narration, from the bottom's perspective (important).

2. Both are virgins, one-on-one, exquisitely beautiful, peerless war god Zha x goofy, cheerful star lord Bing.

3. A short, sweet story featuring flower-vomiting syndrome, broadcast thoughts, a doll sharing senses, and one character shrinking and being adopted by the other.

4. They fight at first, then fall for each other.

5. Based on Investiture of the Gods, with lots of original worldbuilding and a few myths and folk legends added.

Theme: Face the past and embrace a new beginning with kindness.