This Alpha Is Far Too Cautious

Jiang Yue, a transmigrator, a straight man, and an ABO fiction writer in his previous life.

After transmigrating, he spent eighteen years carefully observing the world and discovered that he had landed in a complicated fictional universe, specifically an old-school BL ABO novel.

Why? It was simple.

On the street, an Alpha and an Omega would suddenly be carrying each other bridal-style. Around the next corner, a handsome man would go into heat. Even on his way downstairs, he might run into two dazzlingly handsome men gazing at each other with deep affection.

When it came to pheromone scents, the ones who smelled like boreal coniferous forests or liquor stores were all iron-blooded Alphas, while those who wanted to open flower shops or fruit salad shops were all iron-blooded Omegas.

That wasn't even the most terrifying part. The truly terrifying thing was that most people here were seriously messed up.

For example, the top student, school bully, and rich young master in his year each had a different pheromone-related genetic disorder.

For example, the country's crown prince was blind, the second prince was disabled, and the third prince was mentally ill.

Good heavens, had being sick become the latest fashion accessory?

Jiang Yue wasn't afraid. As a novelist, he knew all the tropes. He wanted to do nothing but protect his chastity and keep his flower pure.

But in a BL novel, thanks to that damnable balancing act, anyone who became a main character would be assigned a partner and risk turning gay.

He made up his mind: in this life, he had to avoid every possibility of becoming a main character. He would live quietly as an extra, find a female Omega to marry, and if he couldn't, he'd stay single until he died of old age.

But...

After eighteen peaceful years as an extra, he unexpectedly presented as an Alpha, and a System suddenly appeared in his brain.

The sky was falling...

*

His System was a True Love System. Its job was to maintain peace in the small worlds and help the protagonists find their destined partners and live happily ever after. In short, it was a matchmaking System.

Jiang Yue didn't want to accept reality, but he had to, because failing to complete his missions meant death.

Jiang Yue: They're happy now? What about me? My eyes are a measuring stick. You're just a harem protagonist System in disguise. They're all going to fall for me and try to take me by force.

System: We are a proper matchmaking System.

Jiang Yue: I don't believe you. Prove it.

System: ...

One year later.

Jiang Yue: What did I tell you! What did I tell you! Look, they really did fall for me! Can I claim workers' compensation?

System: Sorry, the server is busy.

Jiang Yue: No way. I can't take on a whole group. I have to raise a batch of gu so there's only one left. He can take out the others, and when he's feeling smug, I'll take him out.

System: He's worked so hard, taking out more than ten people by himself. Why don't you just give in?

Jiang Yue: I'd rather die than give in!

*

"Set One: The Fake Young Master and His True Love"

System: The fake young master is kicked out of the family by the real young master and gets into trouble at his new school with... Please complete the above plot.

Jiang Yue: Gets into trouble with whom?

System: The System rebooted with insufficient power, so the mission details are limited to one hundred characters.

Jiang Yue: ...So I have to make him get into trouble with someone? Who?

System: Mm-hmm~ As long as the mission is completed, anyone will do. You can do it too, Host.

Jiang Yue: Got it. I'll go find a sacrifice.

System: Aren't you going to pick a fight with him?

Jiang Yue: Are you stupid? The protagonist bottom can only pick a fight with his husband. I'm not becoming his husband!

"Set Two: The School Bully's Lifesaving White Moonlight"

System: On the Star Rail, the school bully changes from A to O and becomes an SSS-rank Omega. He goes into heat and causes chaos, and an Alpha steps up to protect him... Please complete the above plot.

Jiang Yue: Ha, SSS-rank? Doesn't that get tiring to read? Wait, Star Rail? Which train?

System: The Star Rail you're riding now. The school bully, who is one minute away from going into heat, is right behind you.

Jiang Yue: ...What? They can just go into heat anywhere, anytime! Where are he, me, and his husband right now?

System: I don't know. The information is incomplete.

Jiang Yue: What good are you? Hurry up and look with me. Is there anyone dazzling on this train? We'll sacrifice that guy and have him bite the school bully!

System: According to a comprehensive AI big data assessment, the most dazzling person on the entire train is the Host.

Jiang Yue: Then find the second most dazzling person!

"Set Three: The Young Master and His One-Night Passion"

System: This is a lavish family banquet...

Jiang Yue: No need to explain. The three essentials of a rich-family banquet are wine throwing, face-slapping, and aphrodisiacs. Which one is it?

System: ...Aphrodisiacs.

Jiang Yue: This is dog-blood so cheesy it could open a door for dog-blood.

System: The heir to the richest family has been drugged with an aphrodisiac and goes into heat right there. He uses sheer willpower to hide in a room, but by chance there's another person in there... Please complete the above plot.

Jiang Yue: Hehe, you haven't loaded the other protagonist.

System: Do your best, Host.

Jiang Yue: Sure thing. I'll go find our young master a wife.

System: With so many people, can you find someone suitable?

Jiang Yue: Even if I can't, I'll have to find someone anyway. Better that a friend dies than me.

"Set Four: The Legion Commander's Devoted Lover"

Jiang Yue: This doesn't need any matchmaking. Aren't these my brother and sister-in-law? I witnessed their happiness with my own eyes. Their love is as solid as my parents'. Leopard and kitten, I'm here!

System: There's enough power now. The affection detector has been downloaded.

Jiang Yue: Run a scan. Let's see how much my own brother loves my sister-in-law. I'll screenshot it and mock him for being lovesick.

System: ...

Jiang Yue: Where'd the System go? Dead?

System: On a scale of 100, their affection for each other is -250.

Jiang Yue: (Looks up nervously at the two AOs gazing intimately at each other.) What? Are you sure?

System: Our equipment is professional-grade.

Jiang Yue: I get it! They're on the enemies-to-lovers route. It's really popular lately. Enemies are enemies, and enemies have to become wives!

System: Huh? But their affection for the Host is 98 and 95, respectively.

Jiang Yue: ...

[Ultra-Talkative Harem Magnet Complainer VS. Massive ABO Love Triangle]

Theme: Even the sarcastic sidekick has a bright future