The Distillery's Porsche's Great Transformation Plan

[The main story is told in third person. The pairing is Porsche x (Hagi + Gin + Mazda). Thanks for subscribing.] My name is Kurosawa Porsche. I used to be a car, but now I'm a Transformer. Yes, the kind from Optimus Prime and Bumblebee. So, you think this is the Transformers universe? Sorry, actually this is DC: Detective Conan. Also known as the Science-Driven World. As one of the Black Organization's poster-boy vehicles, every day I can only follow my big brother and his underlings through gunfire and bloodshed. After a hard day's work, I drag my exhausted body home and listen to other senior cars complain about their bizarre deaths at the hands of rocket launchers or soccer balls. Finally, one day, I awakened and refused to be a slave anymore. To be precise, I awakened a vehicle system from who knows where. It told me that if I completed a series of strange missions, including but not limited to parking illegally by the roadside for a total of 100 hours, running twenty red lights in a row, racing the good guys at 180 kilometers per hour, and circling Tokyo Bay on top of a Shinkansen, I could gradually level up, unlock new forms, and ultimately become an independent, free Transformer. Then I'd escape the miserable fate of being taken out one day by a soccer ball / an eight-egg bomb / a sniper rifle. Optimus Prime, leader of the Transformers, once said that freedom is the right of every living being. Even in the darkness, nothing could stop my heart from pursuing light and freedom. So goodbye, Black Organization. Goodbye, big brother. Tonight, I'm setting sail. I may not have wise oars, but I have wings made of Decepticon-grade Cybertronian steel. From today on, Porsche is free... I mean, free!! Wait, should I recruit a few companions before I leave? That Mazda FD who just joined the Black Organization, and the red Mustang over there: would you like to fly freely above the moon with me? "Rye, Bourbon, I'll ask you one more time." Rum swirled the red wine in his glass, his lips as red as blood. "Are you really sticking to your story that this attempt to kill the undercover agent Scotch failed because Gin's Porsche suddenly came out of nowhere, and your cars both transformed into Gundams and flew off???" ---Reading Tips--- 1. The early chapters are silly and full of bullying, while the later chapters are silly sci-fi. Serious nonsense throughout. Everyone is out of character, so read without thinking too hard. This warning is highlighted. 2. The male lead's pairings include Hagi, Gin, and Mazda FD. This is not a stock-picking story. There may also be a little romantic interaction between Akai-sensei and his car, so please steer clear if that bothers you. 3. All the Police Academy students survive, and the Black Organization members get happy endings too. The author adores everyone, even Vodka, and will save / torment everyone equally. 4. This is primarily set in the Detective Conan universe. The mentions of Transformers and Gundam in the blurb are just there to introduce the Transformer setup, and most details are heavily adapted. Those who haven't seen either series can still enjoy it. [Coming up next: "Debut Now, Police Academy F4"] After Officer Hagiwara died in the line of duty, he thought he would go to the Sanzu River. Instead, he ended up at the Sanzu River Entertainment Agency and was forced to bind with the [Underworld Star Project: Resurrection] System. If he was reborn as an idol trainee, kept up his persona, and became a top-tier star, he could come back to life? Looking at the profile of his new identity, "Domyoji Kensan, 18, a haughty young master who loves singing, dancing, and basketball, and is an excellent dancer," the former bomb disposal officer fell into a long silence... He thought that for a long time to come, he would have to wear Domyoji's disguise alone, making his way in the entertainment industry while secretly envying his classmates, who could keep shining in law enforcement. Then one day, a Ferris wheel bombing took place at Beika Department Store. The next day, the System sent him a partner: Hanada Rui, a rapper who wore sunglasses. A month later, the genius singer-songwriter Saemon Hikaru announced he was joining the group. Another year passed... "Wait!" The three in the middle of rehearsals stared at the tough guy in front of them, chewing on a toothpick. "Class President, you're taking the idol route too?!!" And so, through the four of them working together, Beika's newest boy band, [Sakura F4], swept the entertainment charts and headlines. The domineering dance ace Domyoji, the handsome rap ace Hanada Rui, the romantic vocalist Saemon Hikaru, and the versatile bad boy Misaku Wataru. Four idols with completely different styles formed an all-around boy band, taking on film, television, and music, and thriving in both the arts and athletics. One day, a blond waiter at the Poirot Cafe went to the hottest boy band's autograph event to get a signed album for a coworker. Watching the four of them getting along so well, he sighed enviously. "You four are so close. I almost want to join your group as the fifth member." The four Police Academy grads, still keeping their secret identities and earning popularity points to resurrect themselves, looked horrified. "No, you don't!!!" [Bonus Scene] System: "Actually, I think our group could use another visual. That mixed-race waiter we saw last time was pretty good. I've already come up with a stage name: 'Amuro Sugi...' No, how about 'Amuro Celery'?" Sakura F4: "...That's not good." Enjoy, and have a great time! The takeaway: Give me freedom or give me death.