A Delinquent Wants to Become His Archrival's Guardian

Coming soon: Don't Offer My Boss to Me. Blurb below.

Yan Jun is a sports student who never studies, has a bad temper, and runs with a crowd. In everyone's eyes, he's a terrible student.

One day, Yan Jun bumps shoulders with Qin Yize, the top student and campus heartthrob whom everyone admires. He plans to use it as an excuse to pick a fight, but the good student turns out to be far more than meets the eye. With two quick grappling moves, Qin Yize pins him to the ground and smiles as he threatens, "Don't mess with me, or you'll die without even knowing how it happened~"

His voice is gentle, with a lilting note at the end, but the warning in his eyes is no joke. From then on, Yan Jun holds a grudge against this smiling snake.

One day, in the pouring rain, Yan Jun rides his bike into someone. When he gets off to look, it's Qin Yize! He's hurt his head and is unconscious. Terrified, Yan Jun quickly carries him home on his back.

When Qin Yize wakes up, he's lost his memory, and his mind has regressed to that of a seven-year-old.

Yan Jun feels as if the sky has fallen: What the hell! I'm going to lose everything I own!

Even though Qin Yize has regressed to age seven, he's still devious and cunning. All day long, he clings to Yan Jun, pitifully calling him "Big Brother~ Big Brother~," ordering him around and monopolizing his attention. Like a sneaky little tiger, he squeezes into Yan Jun's bed every night.

At first, Yan Jun gets worked up and protests. Gradually, the constant clinginess wears him down until he has no will to live. In the end, he gives in: "Fine, fine, whatever you want, Big Brother will give it to you!"

The sly, scheming fake child slips his hands under Yan Jun's shirt and holds him tight. "All I need is Big Brother~"

Once he's gotten used to having Qin Yize around, Yan Jun thinks: If he can't recover, I might as well raise him for the rest of my life!

But every dream has to end eventually.

Qin Yize's father finally discovers his son is missing and takes him back. The fake child regains his senses, but forgets all the days and nights they spent together. All that's left is his distant retreating figure: "Thank you for taking care of me. There's some money on this card. It should come in handy given your family's situation... Think of it as compensation."

Yan Jun's heart aches with bitterness. He feels as if his feelings have been deceived. "Who wants your filthy money!"

I only want the fake child who followed me around all day calling me "Big Brother"!

He thinks they'll never cross paths again. Qin Yize will keep being the campus heartthrob, making friends wherever he goes, while Yan Jun will carry on as before, just getting by.

But one day, while Yan Jun is talking to a female classmate, Qin Yize appears outside the window like a ghost, staring at him with a smile that doesn't reach his eyes. "You have time to chat with girls, but not to study?"

Yan Jun gives him a cold look. He holds a grudge. "None of your damn business!"

"How is it not my business?" Qin Yize slips a hand into the back of Yan Jun's collar and gently pinches him. His expression suddenly turns pitiful. "Didn't you say you'd take care of me forever? If we don't get into colleges in the same city, how will you take care of me... Hmm, Big Brother?"

Several months later, Yan Jun retreats in terror to the corner, hiding under a blanket, his face flushed as he cries out, "Qin Yize, I'm... I'm your big brother! What are you doing?"

The fake child smiles gently, but his hands are anything but gentle. "Big Brother can be my wife, too. There's no conflict~"

[Reading Guide]

1. The leads are each other's one and only, 1v1. The gong initially thinks he likes a girl, but later realizes it wasn't really love.

2. Neither lead is perfect. They each have flaws to work on, so please keep that in mind before reading.

3. Feel free to stay or go. You don't need to notify the author if you drop the story.

Don't Offer My Boss to Me is a gender-shifting story. The shou can change between male and female. If that's not your thing, please skip it.

Zheng Yuxian is descended from a snake god, but the inheritance is pretty useless. All it gives him is the ability to switch between male and female.

It's the 21st century. He's in his early thirties, tall, strong, and handsome, and works as a bodyguard for a wealthy family. He works hard so he can try all the best food and wine in the world and buy a big motorcycle!

...As for continuing the ancient god's bloodline, he doesn't want to get pregnant, and his mother can't be bothered to demand it of him.

Then one day, his handsome and generous young boss comes down with a strange illness that no medicine can cure. Zheng Yuxian doesn't want to change jobs, so he silently prays for his boss to recover soon.

Just then, his mother comes to him with a serious expression. "Son, the family that worshipped our ancestors many years ago suddenly wants to fulfill their contract! It seems their only son has come down with a strange illness. They think it's a backlash for breaking their oath, so they want to make things right in a hurry..."

Zheng Yuxian: "Huh? I'm not marrying some sickly guy!"

His mother: "That sickly guy is named Yao Shuo."

Zheng Yuxian: "Damn, isn't that my boss?!"

Remembering how generous and kindhearted Young Master Yao has been to him, Zheng Yuxian wavers. "...He only has to serve me for a little while, right?"

His mother flips through an ancient book. "That seems to be the case..."

W-Well, all right! Zheng Yuxian thinks: If I turn into a woman, he won't know it's me anyway.

And so the sickly Young Master Yao is "married" into the Zheng family.

-

Yao Shuo, the most eligible bachelor in Fancheng, never imagined that one day he would be "married" off.

Growing up, he'd never heard of a household guardian spirit. Now he's fallen ill, and has to honor his family's promise by being treated as an offering and sent to the home of a snake god's descendant?

What utter nonsense!

But when he sees the descendant of the snake god, only one thought crosses his mind: ...Our ancestors truly were wise and mighty.

This snake goddess is tall and athletic, with a languid, stunning beauty. She's exactly his type!

Wouldn't it be even better if they made this marriage official?

Looking at her strangely guilty, evasive eyes, Yao Shuo smiles gently. "My lady, I look forward to getting along with you."

The snake goddess tugs at her skirt, trying to keep her balance in her high heels. She gives an awkward smile and makes the signature gesture of his bodyguard: scratching his head and reaching back for a cigarette. "Ahem, sure, sure~"

Yao Shuo: ? Why does this feel so familiar?

Theme: Two lonely people warm and save each other