The Way Home

When I was in the Forbidden City, I specially lingered in Yonghe Palace, thinking that this was the place where Shi Shi and Li Han had stayed. When I traveled to Xining, I walked past Kumbum Monastery, the Great Mosque, and even Huangshui, thinking that this was the place where Li Han had been. I really love this book, Shi Shi and Li Han so much. It's okay if it doesn't have an ending. At least in my imagination, Li Han and Shi Shi can spend the rest of their lives happily together.

I was a 14-year-old girl in 2007, and now I am a mother. Over the past 14 years, I have read this novel, my favorite, countless times. There must be no one more affected by this book than me, right? Because of this book, I named my child Dongdong.

A little essay about getting lost and returning home. I wrote whatever came to my mind, without any logic. This is purely a personal opinion, don't comment if you don't like it. Fourteen gave Li Han unreserved, desperate and passionate love. He and Li Han lived a monogamous life after marriage, and neither Si nor Thirteen could do it. Knowing Li Nan's origin, he still allowed Li Han to adopt Li Nan, and allowed Li Han to go to the Four and Thirteen families. He did not hesitate to find a way to help Li Han find a small pendant. He knew that Li Han yearned for freedom and the broad world. He would be ashamed and uncomfortable with other women and their children. This was something that neither Four nor Thirteen could do. Try to make Li Han happy, give Li Han all the freedom he can, take the initiative to serve Li Han, put Li Han's position above yourself and lower your own position The fourth child just wants Li Han to be a canary in his house. He gives her more love than other wives and concubines. This is all the fourth child can give to Li Han. It is conceivable that if Li Han marries the fourth child, the fourth child will never give her such an equal relationship and so much freedom. He will favor others and marry new people. Ye Da must love Shi Shi very much A handsome young man, very handsome. The fourth child is "not as good as the thirteenth and fourteenth". He is a good-looking young man, quite tall, young and handsome. Horse riding, accurate archery (four arrows shot around one of Li Han's, shooting horses and pheasants), good calligraphy, piano, flute, boxing and kicking skills to defeat a group of people, strong muscles, energetic, political ability, straightforward, high-spirited, vitality, infatuation, and execution ability (when it comes to learning to swim, learn swimming the best) He knows what he wants. He likes Li Han and never hides it. He lets the whole world know it from the beginning and pursues it without hesitation, unlike the fourth and thirteenth who hesitate and hesitate. But he is not reckless and has a deep mind. He keeps many things in his heart. Li Han's advantages She is very beautiful (on the bus, a smoking man took one look at her and was stunned. On the street, Qingtai took one look at her and couldn't forget her. She was stopped in the street by a guard who was less than 20 years old when she was over thirty). She has a good figure and skin. She has a calm, independent, elegant and noble temperament. She is the most dazzling wherever she goes. Her aesthetics are very good (people always ask what her clothes are) Where did he do it), he loves reading, has deep thoughts, is very smart, has high emotional intelligence, is very eloquent, is very humorous, loves freedom and landscapes, does not fight or grab (with other wives and concubines), does not rely on pampering, treats the servants as equals, and is neither humble nor arrogant to those who are more noble than him. He is very good to the fourteenth children, handles any environment indifferently, and knows his identity In "Lost", Shi Shi seems to be just a supporting character, but in fact the author uses many details to secretly write about him and his feelings for Li Han. The author's description of him is the most comprehensive and detailed. For example, it writes about Shi Shi's not bringing Fu Jin to the banquet, about how uncomfortable he was with Li Han after having a son, about Shi Shi's pain after being accused of marriage, and about how lonely Shi Shi looked when he saw Li Han for the first time after his wedding. Even writing "I haven't seen you for a long time" has a reason behind it. The fourth child wrote the names of all the princes, but the author only specifically named the fourteenth name through Li Han's mouth. Looking closely at "Lost", it seems that the male protagonist is the fourth child. In fact, the author describes the fourteenth child in the most detail. Some of the descriptions of the fourth child are even meant to compare with the fourteenth child, such as the attitude of wives, concubines, and children. But because Shi Shi is not with Li Han yet, he can only write it secretly from the side. These descriptions are very deep and need to be carefully studied. In fact, the author used a lot of pen and ink for Fourteen from the beginning. The author told readers from the beginning that Fourteen was the male protagonist, but no one noticed it. The main theme of the whole article is Li Han's narration about buying a computer: She believes that Shi Shi's feelings for her are because she wants it so much because she can't get it. After getting it, she will find that it is not that good at all, but a piece of cake. There is also a continuation of the story of the princess and the prince that she told Fourteen, which is also telling Fourteen that the life he expected to live together will end up in a mess, and they will hate each other. But Shi Shi spent his whole life telling her that this was not the case. His love for her could stand the test of time. He gave Li Han much more love than Li Han expected from love. And Li Han also gradually fell in love with Shi Shi in the tender love that lasted for more than fourteen years. Shi Shi became the most important person in her life, and they became the only ones who were inseparable from each other. When she thought she was about to die after drinking the poisonous wine, her first thought was: She hadn't had time to see Fourteen again. The first thing he did after regaining his freedom was to ride on horseback and gallop to find Fourteen. After hearing Li Han's story, Fourteen's reaction to the prince's change of heart was that he "deserved it". When he heard Li Han talk about children born by other women, Fourteen "drew his head and drank tea without speaking." This is the most powerless and unchangeable thing about Shi Shi, that is, he has to have other women and children with other women. This was a responsibility that aristocratic men of that era could not shirk. He couldn't marry or have children for Li Han, because that would make Li Han the target of public criticism. Even if he only favors Li Han and has few heirs, it will bring trouble to Li Han. All he can do is to have enough heirs before Li Han comes in, so that he can confidently live a monogamous life with Li Han. But he only deals with other women, or feels wronged by himself. He himself said that only Li Han can make him "happy". It is conceivable that when he is intimate with other women, he wants the other woman to become Li Han, because the only one he wants is Li Han. As for his children, he thought Li Han would not like them, so he didn't want them to appear in front of Li Han. His father's love was all given to Dongdong, just like his love was all given to Li Han. When it comes to his other women and children, he is always instinctively ashamed, guilty, and uncomfortable. This is very different from the attitude of Four and Thirteen. Usually, he also tries to avoid letting Li Han meet his other women and children. As for Li Han's identity as Xiang Fujin, he will always feel guilty, even if Li Han doesn't care at all, he does. In his heart, Li Han is his only wife, and he also pursues this in his daily life. When Li Han pokes holes, he behaves strangely. Because he felt guilty, but there was nothing he could do. Ye Da is so awesome. Letting Li Han run away for three years may be to leave enough time for Shi Shi to have children, so that Shi Shi and Li Han can live a monogamous life without any obstacles as a matter of course. (But I believe that even if Li Han did not run away, Shi Shi would still have the courage to resist the pressure of his children for Li Han.) At the same time, running away for three years is very consistent with Li Han's character and thoughts. She was very, very resistant to marrying Fourteen. She could only hope that after hiding for a few years, Fourteen's feelings would fade and he would let go of her and stop forcing her. So when they saw Fourteen again, she said feebly: Why won't you let me go? And she would rather never marry than marry Shi Shi. But it was impossible for Shi Shi to let her go. Li Han was kidnapped back to Beijing, and the emperor proposed marriage. Her resistance to the marriage would bring misfortune to the whole family, so she had no choice but to give in. The night with Thirteen was also the last resistance to fate before accepting it. She loves equality, freedom, and mountains and rivers so much. Her ideal should be a life like Xu Xiake's, so she chose Dalan. It's not that she loves Dalan, but that only Dalan can give her such a free and indifferent life. And marrying Shi Shi was like going to jail for a lifetime for her. She faces people she doesn't like or even hates every day (she didn't expect that she would fall in love with Shi Shi), and is forced to have physical intimacy. She no longer has freedom, not even the freedom to leave the capital or even leave the house. She is just a concubine with a higher status. She has to look at the face of her husband who has a much higher status than herself. She has to share a man with many other women. She also has to look at the face of her direct descendant Fujin and is forced to participate in the struggle in the inner house. She felt that life after marrying Shi Shi would be hopeless and there would be no happiness at all. But Fourteen gave her love far beyond her expectations, moved her, and taught her true love. Fourteen said: "I have to wrong you to accompany me in this life, and I will accompany you wherever you want to go in the next life." Fourteen knows everything, he understands Li Han, he has read Li Han's travel notes, and knows Li Han's hobbies, ideals and yearnings. He knows that he has trapped Li Han's life and knows that he has wronged Li Han, but he cannot let go because he loves her so much and he cannot live without her. She loves her so much that he will still be with her in the next life. If there is a next life, he should accompany her, accompany her to live the life she longs for, and accompany her around the world. Li Han's answer was only one word "good". There is only one short word, but I think this is the most romantic and best answer in the world. That is, Li Han is also willing to be with Shi Shi in the next life. Is there any answer in the world that could express her love better than this? From Fourteen falling in love with Li Han, searching hard but not finding love, to the relationship between the two reaching a dead end, Fourteen forcing Li Han in despair, and then Li Han running away, Fourteen waiting for three years, and then to their marriage that started with coercion and hatred. After nearly twenty years, Li Han finally gave Fourteen the same response: We will be together in the next life. Shi Shi failed from the beginning. Because of his age and personality, Li Han didn't even think about getting to know him and didn't give him the slightest chance. What can attract Li Han is a deep and mature man like Lao Si who knows how to flirt. Later, the long marriage years gave Li Han enough time to understand Shi Shi and see the good in Shi Shi. Li Han is so smart that he must know that Fourteenth actually has many advantages that the Fourth child does not have, and he also knows that marrying Fourteenth will definitely be happier than marrying the Fourth child. Later, Li Han's feelings for Shi Shi should have far exceeded his original feelings for Lao Si. The attraction to the fourth child is just hormonal, but to the fourteenth, it is me in you, you in me, the deep love of flesh and blood. I once again lamented that Ye Da is so awesome and his writing power is so deep. It's all line drawing and profile description, without very straightforward or explicit expressions, but the plot setting is so reasonable and in line with the character's personality. Absolutely amazing. It gives readers a lot of space to savor. I started watching "The Lost Way" in 2007. It has been nearly 20 years since I read it countless times. Every time I read it, it was like reading comprehension, carefully understanding the author's intention, but I still never tire of it. This is truly my favorite novel in my life. I loved it so much that I named my child Dongdong. Meeting in the autumn of the 40th year of Kangxi's reign Falling in love with Li Han in February 41st At the beginning of the 42nd year, Li Han was invited to attend a birthday party, and during the Mid-Autumn Festival, Li Han and Si were together. In the spring of forty-three years, he married his direct wife Fujin. In June, Li Han met the two Fujins. On September 9th, he met Li Han for the first time after getting married. In December, he went to the manor. In the first month of the forty-fourth year, Fourteen hit me with my fourth child, and they had QJ in May Li Han returned to Beijing in February 1947 Married to Li Han in April 1948 I was pregnant in the first month of the forty-ninth year and gave birth to Dongdong in October.

It's been almost 20 years and my children are all in college. I also bought the physical book that year. Come out and finish writing, don't just come out and lock the text. We will continue to support you.

I read a lot of Qing Dynasty stories back then, and the only ones I can pick up and read now are Lost and Return. I basically revisit them after a while. I have been looking forward to seeing the ending, author! Thank you for letting me see such a favorite book!

When I read this book for the first time in high school, I thought it was so good and sweet. Then I read it more and more often, and I burst into tears every time I read it.

Come back to see, leave in despair

I bent down and pulled out the scroll he put on his lap. Although I knew what it was, I couldn't help but unfold it and read it. It was a map of the northwest. I traced those places with my fingers and stopped in Xining. We had lived there for almost two years. If I could take Dongdong with me, I would be happy to stay there for the rest of my life. Although Fourteen may be reluctant at first, it is better than now, not being able to see my daughter and being timid. The northwest is also a unique scenery. Fourteen turned his head to look at me, his eyes dull. He rarely looked so helpless. Fourteen and I looked at each other quietly for a while, and he suddenly said: "You must regret it. It's useless even if you regret it. I won't let you go with him even if I die." I don't care about his incomprehensible things. He has encountered too many unsatisfactory things recently. His dreams were shattered, his brothers turned against each other, his parents died one after another without seeing him for the last time, and even his daughter was taken away. Even I have become extremely depressed, let alone him. I pulled Shisi up, and he cooperated with me obediently. I thought carefully about how to comfort him. Before I could think of it, Shi Shi hugged me tightly. I buried my head in his chest and whispered, "Only by your side can I feel at ease. We have been together for ten years, and you still don't understand me. If I had fancyed that position, how could I have stopped you in the first place." Shi Shi finally let go of me and smiled silly at me. There were too many annoying things. Seeing him smile made me happy. I couldn't help but step up and kiss his face. He suddenly picked me up and I was shocked. We are both in our thirties and he is still so childish. I teased: "Do you always hug girls like this when I don't care about you? Am I considered heavy?" Fourteen replied: "You are the heaviest, pressing in my heart, let go of anyone else." I couldn't help but loosen my hand around his neck, and he looked at me with a proud smile. I don't know who he learned this from. After dinner, there was a sudden rumor that someone wanted to see me, saying that he was an old friend. In my current situation, which old friend would dare to come to see me, I couldn't help but wonder. When I see Nie Jing's face, I can only strangle his heart. Doesn't he know that he is a rebel? He smiled and sat on the rocking chair I made, looked at the layout of the living room, and said, "It doesn't look as bad as I thought." He looked at me again, nodded and said, "People are getting fat too. After all, a skinny camel is bigger than a horse." I was so angry that I laughed, did he come all the way just to see my joke? I poured a cup of tea, took a sip, and said quietly: "How far do you think the Forbidden City is from here?" Nie Jing couldn't figure out my routine and said blankly: "It only takes half a day to get back and forth." I didn't say anything, just looked at his calm smile. Nie Jing suddenly jumped up from his chair and shouted in a sharp voice: "I am just a countryman. I used to work with my master. I came here to care about my master's kindness." I didn't want to scare him, but I couldn't lie to him, so I could only simply tell him that I occasionally learned that the emperor knew about a rebel named Nie Jing. Now I'm afraid that both Fourteenth and I are under constant surveillance. Things have reached this point, and we can only watch. My fate, the fate of all of us, is in his hands. If he really wanted to embarrass Nie Jing, why wait until today. After Nie Jing found out, he walked around the yard several times. He still couldn't figure out how the emperor knew about this little traitor who was so low-key. I don't want to think too much about the reason. He and Li Nan were probably implicated by me. Now I just hope that they will always be safe. Nie Jing only stayed for half a day under my threat and then left. Now they want to stay as far away from me as possible. Nie Jing borrowed five thousand taels before leaving. This is not a small amount for me, but it is not impossible to get it. I asked Dongyun to get him a banknote, and he took it After receiving the money, I counted it carefully. I walked over and gave him a hard pat on the head, saying, "I don't want you to write an IOU. What's the use of the free money?" Nie Jing chuckled and said, "You are in danger now, so just treat it as safe with me." I glanced at him and saw how much better he was than me. Fourteen was very happy about Nie Jing's arrival, and I didn't disappoint him. I was leaning on the bed and reading Jin Yan's letter. Nie Jing still told her about me. Fortunately, Jin Yan didn't break up with me in the letter. She was just worried about me and asked me to pay attention to my mentality and not to get into trouble. The concern of this friend and relative from more than ten years ago was like a big tree accidentally discovered on a hot day, which made me feel at ease. Nie Jing said that he came to see me because Jin Yanzhi had no other choice and wanted to borrow some money. Hey, no matter why he came to me, I should be content. He is just worried about Nie Jing. He is not short of money. Now that the new emperor has just ascended the throne, he wonders if he will plan some grand plan to restore the country with his friends and friends at this juncture? When Fourteen handed me the tea, I realized that I had been in a daze for a long time. After drinking the tea, Fourteen kept teasing me, and I didn't refuse him. In this situation, I just wanted to make him happy. During the Chinese New Year, the emperor didn't call us into the palace. It didn't matter anything else, except that we couldn't see Dongdong again. Thinking about it carefully, Fourteenth and I haven't seen Dongdong for almost three months. We wrote privately to Thirteen, and he just wrote back and said that I don't need to worry, because the emperor loves Dongdong very much. I just miss her, but as long as she is healthy and happy now, can she be happy? There is nothing I can do, and such repeated thinking can only torture myself. Of the people in the mansion, I am the only one accompanying Shi Shi in Tangquan, and everyone else is still in the capital. That's fine. If they are here, they might be like Empress Dowager De, and make Shi Shi angry. Empress De Fei passed away not long ago, and in the current situation, neither Shi Shi nor I have the heart to celebrate the New Year. On the night of New Year's Eve, Fourteenth and I didn't know what to say in front of the table full of food, so I asked Dongyun and Bailu to join us for dinner. It would be more lively with more people, and Fourteenth naturally agreed happily. He still sits in front of me and picks up food for me just like he did many years ago. Most of the dishes are meat dishes, and Shi Shi is a typical meatless person, and of course I am too. After Shi Shi gave me a fish ball, I was so disgusted that I retched. Usually I like this kind of greasy food the most. After Shi Shi brought me tea and rinsed my mouth, I couldn't get close to the food on the table. I was sitting on an armchair away from the dining table. Fourteen squatted in front of me and asked, "Are you okay? I'm going to call the doctor over now." Then without waiting for my answer, he shouted, "Guo Ke! Guo Ke!" I covered his mouth with my hand. His loud voice really made my head hurt. He looked at me innocently. I let go of him and said to him with a smile: "As long as I don't smell the food, I won't feel uncomfortable. I'll just ask the doctor to prescribe some medicine later." When the doctor checked my pulse, Shi Shi held my other hand. I could feel him shaking. It wasn't like he was vomiting blood. What was he afraid of? After the doctor checked my pulse, he raised his hand and shouted to me: "Congratulations, Master Fourteen, Fujin is two months pregnant." When I was in the palace, I had always had a poor appetite and even my menstruation was irregular, so I didn't pay much attention to it. Who would have thought that my second child would arrive at this time? This was probably God's will. Of course, Fourteen is very happy. The arrival of a new life has completely diverted his attention. No matter what kind of disturbance there is outside, he will not be ready to move. It seems that the arrival of this child is not all bad. My health is far better than that of a woman in my twenties. Even in modern times, I can be considered an advanced maternal age. Now that I cannot have a caesarean section, I am really worried that the baby will not be delivered safely. I have always liked reading, but now I am being watched all the time, and I have no interest in going out, so I often lean on my small sofa to read, while Shi Shiwo glances sideways at me from the corner. He is worried that I will consume my energy reading, but he can't control me. Dongyun's shoulders were twitching because he was so amused by his behavior. I was okay at first, but after a few days I couldn't hold it in anymore when I saw him still like that, so I had to put down the book and be bored with him. The days when I couldn't read were really boring, so I asked Guo Ke to get a lot of thin wooden boards, paste them with white paper and stick them on the wooden boards, write words on them, and it became a deck of playing cards. When I was in college, I often watched other people play. At that time, I spent all day in the laboratory and had no interest. Thinking about it now, I really regret not studying the various ways of playing cards carefully. When I got excited, I asked someone to make a basket according to my drawings. I found a soccer ball used for Cuju and slightly modified it to make a basketball. At first, I often played with my brother Minhui, and my level was pretty good. After I gave birth to my child, I asked Shi Shi to play with me. If the situation is good, Shi Shi and I will stay here forever, and life will have to go on. In March, I was already swollen like a ball. I probably realized that I didn't have the capital to make troubles, so I formulated a strict diet according to the doctor's requirements to ensure balanced nutrition without excess. Fourteen I have been very nervous since I got pregnant, and even my servants are extremely cautious. I can't help but feel embarrassed, and it's not my first child! We were playing poker when Thirteen came. I originally wanted to play in the pavilion outside, but Fourteen said it was windy outside, so we should stay indoors. Thirteen picked up the wooden sign I made, looked at it, and asked, "What is this? I haven't seen it anywhere else." Fourteen stood up and snatched it away, saying angrily: "It's just a recreational thing. Does Prince Yi even care about this?" Thirteen sat down leisurely and looked at Fourteen quietly without saying anything. Probably because I didn't want to pay attention to him, I was disgusted by Fourteen's appearance. I dismissed the few people I had just invited to play cards together. It seemed that I couldn't play today. It's rare for luck to be so good. Hey. I walked up to Fourteenth, took his arm and said, "If you lose in the card game, you are just unlucky. How can you take it out on others?" Fourteenth turned to look at me, his eyes full of disbelief. He probably couldn't figure out why I was speaking for Thirteen. I also stared at him. After all, my momentum was stronger than his. He lowered his head and sat on the stool and turned his head without saying anything. After I was satisfied, I answered Thirteen's question: "It's a game similar to mahjong. I'll teach you how to play it when I have time." But he probably didn't have the time or interest to learn this. We haven't seen each other for more than half a year. Thirteen looked much more energetic. He smiled at me and said, "Okay." Thirteen is here to announce the decree, and I know that in this situation he will not simply come to see me. Dongdong was ill, and the emperor sent him to take me into the palace to accompany the princess. Whether it was a blessing or a misfortune, it was always a good thing to have the opportunity to see Dongdong. Thirteen and I set out in the afternoon, and I wanted to run to my daughter right now. Although Shi Shi didn't say it, I knew his grievances and I didn't know how to eliminate his uneasiness. Before leaving, he hugged me tightly and didn't want to let go. He buried his head in my chest and said in a low voice: "Take care of your health, eat well, and come back soon." I patted his shoulder and comforted him: "I will be back soon, don't worry about me, I will write to you." Sitting in the carriage with Dongyun, I put my hand on my lower abdomen. This is my second child. After giving birth to him, even if Shishi and I can no longer protect Dongdong in the future, he can still protect his sister. Intuitively, I have determined in my heart that he is a boy. After arriving at the palace, I first met with the emperor. He probably didn't want to pay attention to me and asked me to wait in the East Nuan Pavilion of Qianqing Palace. It suddenly occurred to me that in the forty-eighth year of Emperor Kangxi's reign, I was here waiting for the emperor's summons after my fourteenth wedding. It's been almost fifteen years, and I still haven't made any progress at all. In this era, everyone's fate is in the hands of the emperor. It's no wonder that fathers and sons have become enemies and brothers have killed each other in order to compete for that position throughout the ages. Everything now can only be decided by God. No one knows what tomorrow will be like, or whether there will be a tomorrow... After waiting for about a quarter of an hour, he came in from the door and walked straight to the throne. I knelt down and saluted. This action was done smoothly even when I was five months pregnant. I lowered my head and waited for him to let me get up, but he didn't speak for a long time, and I didn't dare to show anything. I could only try my best to adjust my posture without pressing my stomach. When I thought he had forgotten me, he finally said: "Get up!" I stood up and looked at him in a daze, feeling that he was a lot stranger. He was not the Fourth Master who once held me and kissed me, nor was he Prince Yong who was indifferent and disgusted with me. At this moment, he looked more like the late emperor. He came close to me and said, "Dongdong is at Chan'er's place. Go and see her." I stepped away without hesitation and heard him say from behind: "I... I will never do that to you again. You don't have to be afraid." When I met Dongdong, I realized that the matter was much more serious than I thought. My little sister said that Dongdong had been ill for a month. At first, he just caught a cold, but after a long time, it turned into typhoid fever. She has been making a lot of noise recently, insisting on seeing me, otherwise she will not take medicine, and refuses to listen to anyone's advice. The emperor felt sorry for Dongdong, so he summoned me into the palace. I sat beside Dongdong's bed and touched her face. She lost a lot of weight and was still sleeping. I woke her up. She looked at me with misty eyes and called: "Mom." I couldn't help but laugh, she was still as cute as when she was a child. After she woke up, she started to lose her temper. She pushed me away and said, "Go away, I don't want to see you. Why do you come to see me if you don't want me anymore?" I really stood up and said to her seriously: "You are my daughter. I will never want you. If you don't want to see me, , I'm leaving now." Before I walked out of the door, she shouted: "Mom, Mom, if you leave, I will never recognize you again." I pretended not to hear and continued walking, and she screamed again: "Mom, mom, come back, come back, I don't want you to leave." It's not that I don't feel sorry for my daughter, it's just that the opportunity to get together is rare. According to Dongdong's temper, if I don't do this, she will probably have a lot of trouble with me for a while. After I went back, she started to drink the medicine obediently, but she still didn't talk to me. She was still a child after all, so it seemed that I still needed to have a good talk with her. I also set up a small table on Dongdong's bed when I had dinner. She still doesn't want to leave me for a moment. After dinner, she and I sat on the same bed. Since she got older, we rarely sleep in the same room. I held her in my arms and said to her: "I left you alone in the palace, do you resent me?" I thought she would cry and complain about me, but she just shook her head with tears in her eyes, and then said to me: "Mom, I heard what Uncle Thirteen said. , You have your difficulties, Ama needs you more than me now, I miss Ama so much." I kissed her face, wiped her tears, and said, "Ama misses you very much, and he will come to see you when he has the chance." I can't make any more promises. Dongdong nodded, I think she also understands some things. I asked her about her life in the palace, and she answered me one by one. It was just that the queen was too strict, and Hongli was still annoyed with him. Before going to bed, she suddenly asked me: "Mom, let me name my brother." No one in the palace seems to know about my pregnancy. Even Shisan was full of doubts when he saw my big belly, but this is normal. Dongdong, like me, firmly believes that the baby in my belly is my younger brother. She always lies on my belly and listens. She may not be able to see her brother's birth, but her love for him will always be the purest. When Hongli came to see Dongdong, Dongdong and I were shooting arrows. In fact, I am not suitable for squatting and drawing the bow now. I can only watch Dongdong play and give some guidance occasionally. Dongdong's illness healed quickly, and within half a month, he was almost recovered. Her level is better than mine, probably because she practiced a lot in the palace. It was lonely in the palace. When Dongdong hit the bullseye, Hongli applauded vigorously. Dongdong looked at Hongli with disdain. Fortunately, Hongli didn't care. I said to Hongli: "Dongdong is in the palace." I have been taken care of by my fourth brother. It is rare for you to have such a bad character." Hongli touched his head and said to me with a silly smile: "No, no, Dongdong is very good. She takes care of me. I know my daughter, it would be better if she doesn't bully others." When we eat together, Hongli always picks up vegetables for Dongdong. Dongdong is impatient. Hey, I don't know who he learned this temper from. Dongdong's appetite is not very good and she is very picky about food. I asked someone to make fruit porridge to supplement her vitamins. Seeing Dongdong eating quietly, the younger sister lowered her head and smiled and said, "She just listens to you, and she won't listen no matter how others try to persuade her." I looked at Dongdong, and she lowered her head with a guilty conscience, not knowing what she was doing again. I asked my little sister, but she didn't tell me. Suddenly I heard a eunuch coming in to deliver the order, calling my little sister to sleep with me today. I helped my little sister get ready. After dressing up, she looked in the mirror and asked me, "Sister Han, do you think I'm beautiful?" I pinched her chin and smiled, "Let me see which family this girl is from. She's so cute and pretty, I can't help but want to kiss her." The little sister took my hand, pulled me to stand in front of the mirror, looked at my face in the mirror, and asked with a confused expression: "Do you think we two look alike?" I looked at the two faces in the mirror, did they look alike? It shouldn't look like this in the first place. This face is no longer Li Han's. I replied: "You are much more beautiful than me." She sat on the stool and said to herself: "He originally wanted to marry you, I am just a substitute. No wonder he always thinks inexplicably when he looks at me." Then she looked at me again, her face full of tears, "Sister Han, he once called Han'er while talking in his sleep. Others don't know, but I know, how can you do this to me." I stared blankly at my little sister, and it turned out that she had known it for a long time. I squatted in front of her, held her hand and said, "He really loves you. You are your husband. I am just his sister-in-law. There will never be any connection between me and him." The younger sister wiped the tears on her face with a handkerchief and said with a choked voice: "He is the emperor. I don't care how many women are around him. I'm just sad that the woman in his heart is you. Why you? Will you become Concubine Dong E one day?" I stared at my little sister with wide eyes, what kind of misunderstanding did I give her to think like this? I couldn't help laughing, but when she saw me laughing, she was so angry that she started crying again. I had no choice but to wipe her tears and said: "I can't compare to Concubine Dong E, who was so beautiful that she was so young and beautiful, and she didn't have such a disaster. The ability of the country, and his throne is not as easy as that of Master Shunzhi. How could such a strict person act like this?" I held her in my arms, patted her back, and continued: "I only think about Shi Shi now, and I am content to be safe with him." Seeing my little sister being wrapped in a quilt and carried away, I really didn't know whether I should be happy for her or pity her. Love between husband and wife is extremely normal, but in the royal family it is so ridiculous. I can only be glad that I didn't marry him in the first place. Such humiliation and boredom are really killing me. And I can't help but think that if the Fourteenth became emperor, we might not be as happy as we are now. When I woke up the next day, I saw my little sister playing shuttlecock with Dongdong in the courtyard. She ran over when she saw me, pointed at my little sister and said, "Mom, look how good my aunt looks today. Uncle Huang loves me so much." She even winked at me. The little girl is thin-skinned and her blush is as cute as an apple. I put my hand on Dongdong's forehead and said, "What do you know, you little kid? How are you doing with your homework? I'm going to check it right away." When Dongdong heard what I said about her homework, she immediately ran away and said as she ran, "Sister Xiaomei said I'm not young anymore, and her mother-in-law gave birth to her at this age." I was stunned by what she said. I always thought she was still a child, but I forgot that in this era, she is already old enough to get married. Who will she marry in the future? A girl in the royal family has never been able to make the decision on her own marriage, and now she is even less able to decide on me in the palace. She doesn't know if she will be able to marry the person she likes in the future. Dongdong's spring clothes were delivered, and no one in the palace treated him badly. Wearing a bright red peony flag dress, she stood in front of me and said proudly: "Mom, this will look good on me." I pulled her and spun her around in front of me and commented: "I don't think it looks as good as the plain lily dress." Although Peony is delicate and alluring, Dongdong is too young to wear it with charm. She also looks beautiful, but a little reluctant, not as beautiful and cute as Lily's one. Dongdong suddenly felt like an eggplant beaten by frost, and said frustratedly: "I knew my aunt was lying to me." She opened her arms, looked at the dress, and said with a memorial expression: "It seems that I can't wear it for you. It's such a pity." I poured Dongdong a cup of tea, and she sat on the stool and sipped the tea unhappily. I looked at her and suddenly thought of something important, so I asked her: "What kind of person do you tell mom you want to marry?" I thought she would be shy, but she started thinking seriously. Then he said to me: "The person I want to marry must be as good to me as Ama is to my mother. He can only like me in his life." Looking at Dongdong's serious expression, I must remind her: "You are now a princess of the Qing Dynasty. Do you know that you can't marry whoever you want." Dongdong shook her hand and the cup fell to the ground. She screamed and jumped up. I asked the servants to clean it up and took her into the back room. I pulled her to sit on the edge of the bed, and I touched her hair, which was very smooth. Normally, Dongdong was particularly reluctant to let anyone touch her head, but now that she was scared, she wasn't so particular about it. Dongdong held my hand in fear and said, "Mom, I don't want to be given away as a gift." I kissed her face and comforted her: "Your uncle loves you so much that he won't treat you like this. Mom will also help you, but there is one thing you must promise mom." Dongdong nodded like garlic. I looked into her eyes and wanted to imprint what I wanted to say on her heart, "You stay away from your uncle's son, especially Hongli." Hongli clung to Dongdong like this, which made me worry. Even if there was only a slight chance, I didn't want my daughter's life to be buried in this deep palace. "And you should stay calm in the palace and don't be in the limelight," I said in a serious tone. Dongdong looked at me in surprise, covered her mouth with her hand, and then said in a very low voice: "You mean Xiaosi?" I nodded, and Dongdong looked at me in disbelief, obviously unable to figure out how her hated Xiaosi could be so highly regarded by me. After a while, she raised three fingers and said to me: "Mom, I don't like people in the palace. I will try to stay away from them in the future." I held her hand and chuckled: "Then who do you like?" She covered her face and smiled secretly, then looked at me between her fingers and said: "I want to marry brother Li Nan. He said he likes me." I don't know how Li Nan said such things to him, but I'm afraid things are not what Dongdong thought. Not wanting to offend Dongdong, I just smiled and said nothing.

How many years has it been? Will it be updated?

More to come??? I really like watching it???