A Proper Dating Sim Isn't Supposed to Be Like This

I'm back from my business trip. I'll try to update with 2,000 words a day.

The story is locked for revisions. I won't start anything else before finishing this one, or I'll be damned. The Detective Conan crossover next door is complete.

As a Lovecraftian creature, Asakawa Haruki has some unusual hobbies. He likes raising people.

"After all, raising a child with your own hands creates a special emotional bond."

That's absolutely right. Asakawa Haruki wholeheartedly agrees.

It would just be better if Dazai weren't the one raising him.

Asakawa Haruki, raised into uselessness by Boss Dazai, lets out his 10,086th sigh.

Then, in an instant, Asakawa Haruki returns to the time when Dazai was a child, and gets bound to a System that calls itself a master of raising people.

Asakawa Haruki's eyes turn to hearts. At last, he can raise someone himself!

But after listening carefully to his plan, the System realizes something is off.

Everyone is gathered to witness Doctor Mori's coup. Standing beside the curtains, Asakawa Haruki frantically signals to Dazai.

Hurry up! Why aren't you making a move? Don't you want to be the boss?

But Dazai merely covers Asakawa Haruki's eyes and tells him to go back and get more calcium.

Feeling underestimated, Asakawa Haruki extends his tentacles. "You don't want to do it? Fine, I'll kill him for you!"

System: Stop, stop! What kind of plot is this? You picked up the wrong IF route script!

The script really is a little off. Port Mafia has gained a spy named Midorikawa Hikaru, and Asakawa follows the clues to the Black Organization.

Asakawa thinks Midorikawa Hikaru and his friends are all ideal candidates for him to raise. So after helping Oda fake his death, he runs away too and joins the Crow Army.

But halfway there, he's seduced by white-haired Gin, and spends his days raising one person after another in Beika, raising yours and then his.

Gin eventually finds out about his two-timing, pins Asakawa down on the bed, asks whether being a traitor was fun, and insists that he choose between Gin's two guns while they're pointed at him.

Asakawa Haruki: Oh, come on, isn't that a bit much?

Asakawa Haruki gets so scared of Beika's terrifyingly talented residents that he flees back to his hometown of Yokohama in the middle of the night. But while he's faking his death, Dazai catches him and has him tied up in a basement.

Asakawa Haruki: I only played a little hard-to-get with you. Was that really necessary?!

But when the blindfold is removed, Asakawa Haruki discovers there are two Dazais standing before him.

How did Boss Dazai, the one who found him first, end up here too?!

Asakawa Haruki is confused.

Did he raise them the wrong way?

But Boss Dazai was the one who taught him how to do it!

□ My own chaotic timeline, with out-of-character moments and a nontraditional take on Lovecraftian fiction, plus original settings.

□ Aiming to raise everyone. White-moonlight romance, with the entire police academy squad saved. A light, sweet, happy ending.

□ The pairings depend on what feels right, probably Dazai. The others will get close too. The story moves between Yokohama and Beika.

□ The protagonist can't speak Earth's languages. Before meeting the System, Boss Dazai teaches him Japanese; afterward, the System translates for him. But the System is from Shandong, so sometimes its translations go wrong.

□ Also, this story is full of love-triangle chaos. Watch out for flying vehicles.

Theme: Perseverance brings success