Give It a Chop, Help Me Become the Strongest Sorcerer!

[Third-person narration]

"Why did you become a jujutsu sorcerer?"

The ferocious yakuza boss (crossed out), the principal of Jujutsu High, stared at me, his voice grave.

I put on an even more solemn expression. "...Because I dream of dying surrounded by adoring fans."

Principal Yaga: "..."

I quickly added, "If possible, I'd like Gojo-sensei to kill me himself. I'd be eternally grateful!"

"Thud!"

...I got hit.

·

As you can see, I'm a high school student who wants to get killed.

But not for the reasons I gave, like wanting to die. That was just a lie I told those naive, sweet-natured sorcerers.

The real reason is my bizarre cursed technique.

My technique, "Death Rewind," lets me come back to life immediately if I die an unnatural death, with the power to defeat whoever killed me.

As cautious as I am, I never reveal my technique. Not even the Six Eyes can detect it.

"...Simply put, I'm so sensitive to pain that I really don't want to live," I made up.

Then I looked at Gojo-sensei across from me, blinking and making pointed hints. "If I got hit with one of your Purple attacks, Gojo-sensei, I'm sure I'd die peacefully without any pain." And then I'd gain the strength to beat you to a pulp.

Gojo-sensei said, "Huh? Is that so?"

He believed me.

Me: Hah. What foolish sorcerers.

Gojo-sensei pulled out a grueling 996 training schedule. "But killing a weakling doesn't feel like much of an accomplishment. How about I help you level up first? If you kill 999 special-grade cursed spirits, I'll reward you with one Purple attack from your teacher."

Me: "..."

That's why I hate sorcerers. They're all musclebound gorillas with the brain capacity to match, yet somehow they keep stumbling into the right answer. I can't do anything about them.

Pouting like a grumpy kitten.jpg

·

Later, I became an incredibly powerful sorcerer.

I was very happy.

Until Sukuna was unsealed...

I was even more thrilled. I shoved Gojo-sensei aside as he prepared to tank the attack, and took a Spatial Slash with my own body. "Thank you, thank you..."

Splat.

I died.

Then I came back to life!

I sprang up like a carp. "Blueberry Yogurt, since you're a good person, I'll make your death quick!"

I got to my feet, flames blazing behind me. "I'll be the one to defeat the King of Curses!"

Sukuna: ?

What a nutcase.

After tanking Sukuna's eighty-one attacks, I became the woman who defeated the King of Curses, the undisputed strongest.

·

After hearing my story, my brother Dazai chuckled. "So, you came to Yokohama to...?"

I said with a knowing air, "As the newly appointed head of the jujutsu world, I need to understand the people and personally travel around collecting information about cursed spirits!"

Brother: "Tell the truth."

I said, "...Those predatory types are terrifying. I came to Yokohama to hide for a while."

Being stuck with a gorilla and the jujutsu world's one and only designated brain is painful enough. Having to put out too (emphasis added) is practically torture!

My brother laughed at me, then opened the Armed Detective Agency's door.

And let in a certain big cat with the Six Eyes.

Me, reaching out in horror: "Little Bunny Dazai, you're so evil! ...No! Don't! ... (carried off by the Six Eyes) &###...&%%?..."

#Killing me only makes me stronger#

#Still begging the strongest to kill me today... Just kill me, no sex!#

#Strength unknown, gets stronger against stronger opponents#

○Reader's Guide○

① The female lead is Dazai's younger sister from Bungo Stray Dogs, and is something of a member of the scriptwriting squad. At first she seems like a clown but is actually full of dark thoughts; later she's just a clown.

② Gojo is the love interest. Choose between 185 and 285.

③ The main story is in third person.

Theme: Cherish life, and cherish love and the people you meet.