[Genshin Impact] A Farm Owner Who Lives Off Her Parents to Raise the Geo Archon

[Updates at 9 p.m. Come check out my upcoming story, "Cosplaying Yingxing, and Hitting Rex Lapis from the Start," and my best friend's ongoing stories, "My Technique Is the Chinese Magical Treasure System" and "My Brother Has Turned into a Ghost Again and Again!"] For five million, you played a pirated farming game that claimed to be a full-dive game. When you woke up, you had a wife you fell in love with at first sight. Taoxia: Oh yeah! My wife Zhongli! I'll farm to support you! Before long, thanks to your outrageous antics, you'd successfully turned a farming simulator into a Teyvat Beloved-by-Everyone Simulator. Not only did you have an older brother who was a knight, you also had an older sister who was an Archon! Even your parents (the System) were there for you! You were so happy! The Heavenly Principles, forced to be the player's parents: I don't want to be your parents, thanks. The others (gods), forced to be the player's older siblings: Anyone who doesn't like Taoxia is trash. Goodbye, you tasteless idiots! The Heavenly Principles: ... Hah! As your farm grew, you gradually became Teyvat's biggest insider. You could sell some wine and have both Dawn Winery and the Fatui scrambling to sign contracts with you. You could sell some fish and have the Liyue Qixing buying it up like crazy, all while looking astonished! Even when you sold ordinary desserts, the Raiden Shogun would wave her hand and declare, 'I'll take all of them!' Life as a farmer was peaceful and happy. Then one day, you learned that the Tsaritsa of Snezhnaya planned to raise a rebellion against the Heavenly Principles. For the sake of family harmony, you stepped in. And so the farmer changed careers and became a savior. Taoxia: Is something wrong here? Then your pet cat turned into another wife (in her younger form). Taoxia: Wait, that seems even more wrong! Much later, after being sandwiched between two dragons until you were on the verge of a breakdown, you finally gave up. You'd wanted to quit the game for a while, but couldn't find the log-out button. This really is a pirated game! I'm filing a complaint! The player wants to quit! Zhongli: Oh? Is A-Tao planning to break our [Contract]? Morax: Then a promise-breaker shall suffer the punishment of eating rocks. You, dragged back and sandwiched once again: ... Wait, the 'eat' in 'eating rocks' in the contract definitely wasn't supposed to mean this! Upcoming story: "I'm a Nameless One Who Cosplays Rimuru" 'Rimuru' died, but then came back to life and became the Slime Rimuru he'd cosplayed as. His life in Teyvat had been colorful, but now he'd arrived on the grand stage of a galactic space comedy. Question: Why leave in the first place? Answer: To find his lost husband. Faced with the vast galaxy, he was completely at a loss. Then his first troublesome friend appeared and helpfully offered a suggestion. Aha: Darling, looking for someone? Why not ask the wondrous Astral Express? Rimuru: (Suddenly enlightened) You're right! Wait. (Slime grows wary) You didn't come here just to watch me make a fool of myself, did you? But he needed to find the person quickly, so he couldn't worry about that. He soon found the Astral Express, showed his ticket, made his request, and got on board without a hitch. Then he and the train crew were forced to go through a series of thrilling manhunts, pursuits, and god-making incidents. The Slime didn't know what to say. Rimuru: Are all the Nameless aboard your Astral Express some kind of cosmic Conan? Why does trouble break out everywhere you go?! Never mind, that wasn't important. What mattered was that you lot had better not stop him from finding Morax! He'd eat you all, so there! To the train crew, Slime Rimuru was a cute, delicate young man who'd lost his husband but could really put away the food. He was also an important companion to them. But... still, you don't have to be quite that good an eater! Spit out the Doomsday Beast, Mother of Deception, Phantylia, and Divine Master you swallowed, already! Reader's guide: 1. Player chaos, comedy, OOC, OOC, OOC. Important things must be said three times. 2. Farming, food, and winemaking, plus a complete package of adventuring and mining. 3. Whether human or Archon, everyone is going farming! 4. The cheat is huge. Huge. Logic is dead. Happy ending. 5. The blurb and premise were settled on 2024.6.22, and I take no responsibility for Genshin Impact's story updates after that. (Please don't blindside me!) Yes, I'm talking about you, the "Limitations of the Gods" PV! Who could have guessed that the Sustainer who kicked the Traveler twins away at the start would go missing and be suspected of treason?! Aaaah, I don't care. I'm blind. I can't see! Theme: Farming is the best!