Night had fallen. A full moon hung high in the deep blue sky, like a bright lamp illuminating the back courtyard of the Qinyun Manor.
Xiao Jianhun reclined against a tiger-skin-covered couch, still dressed in white robes as pure as snow. Under the silvery moonlight, his face looked even paler than his clothes. Yet his gentle smile remained as he watched Qinyun play the zither.
Marquis Changsheng, Zhao Ziyun, had once said that Qinyun's zither playing was meant to be watched, not heard. Now Xiao Jianhun had to admit that Zhao Ziyun's eye for women was every bit as sharp as his swordsmanship. Qinyun's fingers were supple and nimble, their snowy whiteness and smooth sheen all the more striking in the moonlight. Her sidelong glances were as dark as black pearls at the bottom of the sea. She truly was a peerless beauty. Compared with her looks, however, her zither skills, hailed as the finest in the capital, seemed downright clumsy.
Theme:
Actually you are right! In fact, I know it myself, but I wrote it a long time ago because of my pregnancy problem (I don't like to change articles). To be honest, I'm a little afraid to change it because I don't know how to write it myself! Hehe. At that time, my language was very imitative and I didn't have my own style! But it recorded the level of my writing at that time, so I'll share it with everyone!
The article is very good, but some areas need improvement. The plot is not ups and downs enough, and the suspense setting is not very good and not fascinating enough: for example, you can remove the section about Xiao and Murong's discussion and directly describe part of the funeral, which will make the article more compact. At the end, readers will understand the truth. As for Gai Tianxing, the description of him can be stepped up, and he can be portrayed as a gentleman who is worse than Yue Buqun from the beginning (referring to the early stage), so that readers can never think of the mastermind of everything. And the big article seems to reveal the conspiracy from the beginning, and people can basically guess the ending after reading the beginning (… Don't be angry -_-), which makes the readers have no interest in reading further. A little bit of advice, pick a bouquet of flowers and give it to me: keep up the good work!!!!!