None of My Neighbors Are Human

Tang Xiao thinks he is an utterly ordinary human being. So ordinary that every day is dull and tasteless. In the morning, he helps Grandma Lin in Room 103 wheel her coffin outside to air it out. After school, he helps the young lady in Room 205 clear the hair clogging her sink. Before bed, he helps the pregnant woman in Room 308 look for her mischievous child. He also feeds the little animals for the owner of Room 444, who is never home. Even though the coffin is so heavy it feels like someone is lying inside, the hair in the sink seems to move, and strange eyes sometimes turn up when he sweeps under the bed... Tang Xiao still thinks all his neighbors are perfectly normal. His only concern is that people outside are spreading rumors that Happiness Gardens is haunted. Tang Xiao has just one thing to say: What alarmist nonsense! His neighbors are all such nice people! Happiness Gardens is the safest neighborhood in the world! Then one day, ghosts began haunting the world. After the world fell into chaos, you could encounter a ghost anywhere. In libraries, restaurants, schools... even on the street. The death toll soared. But the Special Management Bureau discovered that every evil spirit connected to a young man named Tang Xiao, no matter how deep its resentment or how terrifying its malice, ended up "disappearing." They tracked Tang Xiao down and demanded to know what he had done. Tang Xiao blinked his innocent puppy eyes and smiled serenely. "I just invited them over to my place." "My neighbors are really easy to get along with." Everyone knows that once you enter Happiness Gardens, you never leave. As the sole property owner of the neighborhood, Li Du has raised lots of "little pets" in Room 444. Of them all, his favorite is the human he picked up himself, Tang Xiao. Though this human is a coward and often gets scared by him, and is very hard to please, never liking any of the little gifts Li Du collects from all sorts of places, he still likes this human very, very much. He will keep watching (shijian)... watching (shijian)... watching (shijian)... him... His only concern is that this human is getting more and more delicious. He seems to be losing control of his "appetite." A calm-but-mad, helpful bottom x a nonhuman top who can't tell appetite from love Reader advisory: The protagonist is adored by everyone in the neighborhood. Here's a delicious, crispy new story for you to enjoy! "As a Bewitching Mushroom, I Fell into the Apocalypse" I'm a little gray mushroom. I'm gray and unremarkable, and I have a bewitching toxin. Every creature should stay far away from me. But mutated animals and zombies keep chasing me and trying to bite me. It must be because their intelligence is too low, I thought, clutching my cap where it had been bitten. Maybe the intelligent species in this world will understand me. I'm just a mushroom. All I need is a dark little corner. Finding an owner should be easy for a mushroom like me. The little mushroom, panting as it ran, spotted a badly wounded human and secretly attached itself to him like an ornament. Chief Gu: ...? He picked it up and tossed it away. A moment later, the mushroom stubbornly reappeared. He picked it up again and threw it even farther. The mushroom ran back, clutching its cap, which had almost been bitten again, and flew into a little rage. Chief Gu watched the mushroom slam itself frantically against him, making strange little "puchi puchi" sounds. "..." Forget it. The Bewitching Mushroom settled down on this human. But after a while, the Bewitching Mushroom clutched its cap, utterly astonished. Why was this human bewitched even without being bitten?! One night, after getting drunk, Chief Gu held the Bewitching Mushroom and poured out his heart. "I want to eat you." The Bewitching Mushroom burst into tears. Sobbing, it took a bath, set up a big pot, and studied a recipe for Italian cream of mushroom soup in a manual. Plop. It jumped in. Theme: Help others with kindness, and repay the world with kindness.