I Really Didn't Mean to Turn My Childhood Friend Gay

Next up: an absurdly sweet entertainment-industry body-swap story, The Whole Internet Is Shipping Me with My Arch-Enemy. If you're interested, visit my profile and add it to your collection, mwah~]

Luo Wensheng had a best buddy. They'd grown up together and were close enough to share a pair of pants.

As an adult, his buddy didn't want to marry a stranger for an arranged marriage, so he showed up with a marriage contract.

Luo Wensheng was shocked: How can my best buddy get married? We're both straight men!

Best buddy: It's just a marriage of convenience. We can divorce if it doesn't work out.

Taken in by his buddy, Luo Wensheng readily agreed: I get it! In public, we'll be a loving married couple.

Behind closed doors, we'll still be best buddies!

His best buddy answered with a firm voice: Exactly! We're the best of brothers!

They hit it off, and Luo Wensheng happily registered his marriage with his best buddy, then moved into their luxurious marital home with his luggage.

After the wedding, Luo Wensheng found that his best buddy had changed a lot.

For example, he wouldn't let Luo Wensheng stay up late, drink, or watch sexy male streamers dance.

In the middle of summer, he would complain that he was cold and insist on sharing Luo Wensheng's bed, then wrap his arms around him to sleep.

He'd even get upset if Luo Wensheng so much as glanced at a handsome guy on the street.

It was one thing to keep cuddling and hugging him now and then to maintain their "brotherly bond," but Luo Wensheng had even caught him sneaking a kiss while he was asleep?

Luo Wensheng pondered: Is this really something straight male best buddies do?

His best buddy looked so resolute he could join the party: As straight as they come! Didn't we kiss all the time when we were kids? Didn't we share a bed when we were kids?

Luo Wensheng was relieved: Thank goodness, my buddy hadn't turned gay. He was just overthinking it.

Later, Luo Wensheng grew more and more used to his marriage of convenience with his best buddy.

He'd wake up in his best buddy's arms in the morning, and they'd exchange a good-morning kiss. At night, he'd curl up in those arms to watch horror movies. Sometimes, they'd do that thing, and even help each other out.

Wait... Why did he feel like he wasn't quite straight anymore?

Later still, his half-drunk best buddy pushed him onto the bed, calling him by his nickname and whispering dirty talk as he had his way with him all night.

Luo Wensheng suddenly realized that the buddy who'd insisted he was straight had probably been bent into a pretzel for ages!

& A scheming, overindulgent top who dotes on his wife x a clueless, pretty bottom with a wonderfully weird train of thought

& A sweet childhood-friends romance, with mutual pining

& The top was already in love with the bottom before they married. The bottom is slow to catch on, realizing it only later

Next up, The Whole Internet Is Shipping Me with My Arch-Enemy:

Xu Nuo and Cheng Yao are a pair of arch-enemies known to everyone in the entertainment industry.

They've been at each other's throats since their early days, and whenever they appear together, it's a battlefield.

Until an accident caused them to... switch souls?

Xu Nuo: Waking up to that punchable face of my arch-enemy, who can relate?

Cheng Yao: Waking up eight centimeters shorter. This is a huge loss!

To find a way to switch back as soon as possible, they had to clear their schedules and join a terrible travel variety show together.

The day the guest lineup was announced, their respective fanbases erupted into an unprecedented war.

Bystanders flocked over with snacks, ready to sit back and enjoy the show.

*

At the filming site, the two big shots couldn't stand the sight of each other, leaving the director in utter despair.

The weird thing was, the two big shots were acting completely out of character and insisting on choosing each other as teammates.

They spoke in unison, both utterly determined.

No one could stop them...

Then the fans noticed:

When Xu Nuo accidentally scraped his face on the show, Cheng Yao was even more worried than Xu Nuo himself. He looked so heartbroken, as if he'd been the one who'd been disfigured.

Meanwhile, Xu Nuo, who'd always been absent-minded, started taking meticulous care of his arch-enemy's diet. He asked about all three meals in detail and precisely avoided all sorts of foods and drinks Cheng Yao was allergic to, knowing even more than Cheng Yao's longtime fans.

The two fanbases tried to reassure themselves: It's just a fake friendship manufactured by that lousy show. It's all an act. My idol would never get close to his arch-enemy. Stay calm, stay calm!

Until...

The production crew launched a surprise livestream and caught the two of them in bed together in the middle of the night, holding hands, averting their eyes, and looking awfully intimate.

The fans from both sides: !!!!

We can't stay calm anymore!

[We thought you were arch-enemies. You were secretly getting into bed together behind our backs?]

[We always knew you wanted to screw each other, but we didn't realize you meant in bed (screw).]

[We've brought in a six-foot-wide bed. Please carry on!]

[Is the rest of the stream pay-per-view? I can buy VIP!]

After the livestream clip aired, the "Cheng Nuo" CP appeared out of nowhere and became more popular than ever, shooting up the CP rankings like a bottle rocket to claim the top spot.

The two top-tier stars, who only wanted to switch back into their own bodies and say sayonara to their rival, whom they couldn't stand: ...

This is fucking ridiculous!!!

Also known as:

#ShipThemFastEnoughAndEvenArch-EnemiesCanBecomeTrueLove

#HowToUseWildSchemesToTurnYourRival'sGirlfriendFansIntoFansOfMeAndMyArch-Enemy

#MyArch-EnemyAndI Became the Nation's Favorite Couple After We Switched Souls

"Cold, sharp-tongued, scheming top" x "A dramatic, shameless, leg-shaking bottom"

Theme: Only sincerity is precious