The Adorable Pet Kindergarten

[Please add my upcoming novel, "Fortune-Telling Livestream: Let's Eat Some Gossip," to your reading list OvO] The great demon Jiang Nanyu wakes from a long sleep to inherit his friend's kindergarten, which is on the brink of bankruptcy. Jiang Nanyu says: Why should a great demon have to look after human children? I'll just open a pet kindergarten! Ever since the pet kindergarten opened, pet owners no longer have to worry about their picky little brats. Late one night, a rising young star quietly posts on Weibo: Thank you, kindergarten, for saving my picky little brat! The internet explodes: This rising star has always cultivated a clear-headed, single-person image. Does she secretly have a kid? Realizing she's forgotten to switch accounts, the star immediately posts a photo: That's right. When you reach a certain age, you can have a little kitty. A chuunibyou manga artist: Director, help! My dog has stopped eating and drinking and is depressed! Jiang Nanyu: A few days ago, when your dog was fighting another gang of dogs, you called him Dog Overlord. The other dogs made fun of him. The artist: Director, you've got it wrong. My dog's name is Mengmeng. Jiang Nanyu smiles faintly: Dog Overlord is the name he chose for himself. A newly crowned Best Actor, referred by a friend: Help, Director! My cat's been acting really weird lately. It keeps hissing at me for no reason, even though it used to be so good-natured! Jiang Nanyu: It thinks your acting isn't good enough... The actor: Sorry. I recently took a role in a movie about winning over an emperor, and my cat master might have gotten into character as the emperor. The cat master: Let me teach you how to play an emperor! --- Upcoming novel blurb --- The metaphysics expert Ke Xue, who failed to survive his tribulation in his previous life, transmigrates to the modern world. He starts livestreaming fortune-telling to earn enough merit. But there's something off about the people asking for readings! Caller 1 says fearfully: "Every night at midnight, I can hear my neighbor chopping meat, but I've never seen any bones in their trash. I heard he has a girlfriend, but I've never seen her..." "Is his house haunted?!" Viewers: [Could it be that he's not haunted, but disposing of a body?] Ke Xue calculates with his fingers: Your neighbor is afraid you'll think he can't afford ribs, so he makes a point of chopping tofu at night, when everyone's home. #What you think is a serial killer is actually someone setting an alarm to chop tofu in the middle of the night so all the neighbors know he can afford ribs!# Caller 2: "Streamer, lately I keep hearing faint footsteps around the house, but when I go out to check, they've disappeared." Ke Xue: "Next time, make sure your son finishes his homework before bed instead of staying up late to finish it." Caller 2 breathes a sigh of relief. "Good thing it's not a haunting." Ke Xue: "You're celebrating too soon. A ghost in your house told me about it." Ke Xue adds: "Turn around. The ghost is right behind you." Caller 2: "!" Caller 2 sobs: "Streamer, do you offer ghost-exorcism services?" Ke Xue: "Good news, you know this ghost. It's your mother." "She asked me to remind you to check your child's homework every day. She's already skipped square dancing with her friends three times to look after the kid, and if she skips again, she'll be kicked out of the group." #Caller 2's mother: Fellow house ghosts, you know what it's like. Even after dying, I still have to help raise my grandchild!# Metaphysics livestreaming plus everyday gossip. Not scary. Theme: The strong never complain about their circumstances.