You Novelists Are Taking Things Too Far!

Xi Zheng transmigrated, and four of his hapless group-chat friends came along with him.

The five of them were chosen by an unknown god to play a game. Each game scenario was randomly matched to one of the group members' novels. Only by clearing every scenario could they escape the cruel god's game.

After learning the rules and knowing exactly what he and his friends were like, Xi Zheng fell silent.

Group Member No. 1: ??? Number Two, don't you write pure, innocent school romance? A redemptive love story between a human and a ghost at a school haunted by spirits?

Group Member No. 2: You've got some nerve, Big Shot. Didn't you say you were writing a story about starting a business amid the tides of a new era? I was all set to become an internet mogul, but then you wrote a spacefaring adventure set in the age of interstellar exploration?

Group Member No. 3: Someone do something about Number Four! This guy told me he was writing a cute-pet story and all I had to do was be everyone's favorite. So why am I the beloved junior apprentice in a cosmic-horror cultivation world? My tentacled senior brother wants to trade arms with me so he can eat them QWQ! Is 'I love you, so I'll eat you' not a little too twisted?

Group Member No. 4: My kinks slipped into the story by accident QWQ. Number Five is way worse, okay? He told me his new story was just a naughty little romance, nothing but sex, like a dream. But a cyberpunk sex story is way beyond my kinks! Going to school = getting frisky, taking exams = climaxing. Number Five, are you taking revenge on society?!

Number Five, Xi Zheng, whose kinks are decidedly inhuman: Regrets. I have nothing but regrets.

=

The plot was already a chaotic nightmare, and the role-playing rules only made things worse for the miserable group members.

Playing the heroine in a human-and-ghost romance, the male lead stranded on a desolate planet, a delicate junior sister surrounded by greedy monstrosities, or a sickly Omega pushed to study by a robot big shot would have been bad enough!

But why were they also matched with character cards like [The Villain's Chew Toy], [The Turtle in the Classroom's Communal Tank], [A Chinese Greyhound with Premium Black Dog Blood], and [An Overworked Employee Under the Ghost King]?

[The Villain's Chew Toy]: Waaaah, I got eaten again. I'm not pure anymore...

[The Turtle in the Classroom's Communal Tank]: I saw more ghosts at this school in one night than there are McDonald's branches (despair.jpg).

[An Overworked Employee Under the Ghost King]: Why am I the one who has to say, "The Ghost King has not been this happy in a long time"? Where's the ghost butler?!

Xi Zheng looked at his black paws, opened the group chat in his head, and joined the conversation: "Quick spoiler: what are we supposed to use the black dog blood for?"

[Reading Guide]

1. This blurb was archived on 2023/6/20.

Theme: Love what you do, and let your love know no bounds.