At seventeen, Zhou Shijia had a secret: she had always been in love with her friend Qin Xu.
They met on a gloomy evening. Zhou Shijia had lost another competition that day, and sat exhausted at the entrance to a subway station.
She was a complete mess, and even felt that playing the piano was pointless. But Qin Xu crouched in front of her as if she'd found a treasure, and told her with deep sincerity, "Hi, I'm Qin Xu."
"This might be a little forward, but I want to tell you that I really loved the Fantasia you played at the arts festival."
At first, Zhou Shijia was just confused. It was such a strange, dull piece, so why did Qin Xu say she loved it? Later, Zhou Shijia couldn't help wondering: if Qin Xu loved Fantasia, could there come a day when she might love Zhou Shijia, just as dull as she was, as more than a friend?
But reality wasn't a fantasia.
And years later, she would keep dreaming of the last thing Qin Xu had said to her: "Zhou Shijia, why would you think I'd like girls?"
*
The next time Zhou Shijia played Fantasia in front of an audience was at her solo concert, eight years later.
After a busy schedule, Zhou Shijia took some time to return to her hometown, which she hadn't visited in years. She thought she would never cross paths with Qin Xu again. But after agreeing to a friend's request to take in a roommate, the person who walked through the door was a pale, gaunt Qin Xu.
The moment she saw her, Qin Xu's face filled with fear and shock. So Zhou Shijia didn't linger. She turned and left without a word.
She thought Qin Xu was afraid she'd bring up the past. But what Qin Xu was really afraid of was Zhou Shijia discovering the secret in her luggage: a journal filled with ticket stubs from every one of Zhou Shijia's concerts over the past four years.
It was the love Qin Xu was afraid to confess, a love she'd even lied to her to conceal.
"Jiajia, I was afraid to tell you. I feared my confession would become a way of begging you for pity."
"Qin Xu, I won't pity you. I'll be your source of strength, and I'll love you even more than you can imagine."
World-weary guzheng performer x gentle, reserved English teacher
Rekindled love, healing, happy ending
Theme: Rather than make peace and forgive, break it and start over
