The Guests Keep Wanting to Eat Me

Lan Ding, a product-promoting streamer in a supernatural livestream, has a major problem: because of his unusual constitution, guests are always drawn to him and want to kill and eat him.

Lan Ding: "This mask is carefully made by the Spider Woman. It's lightweight, breathable, and durable. Our guest, the Slit-Mouthed Woman, is trying on the pink one... Slit-Mouthed Woman, sit still! Don't hold those scissors to my neck. Put the mask on properly, and don't open your mouth!..."

With a gaping maw right in front of him, Lan Ding finally lost his patience and knocked out the Slit-Mouthed Woman on camera.

"Sorry, we lost another guest. I'll go take care of it. The masks are on link number one in the little black cart."

[Spider Silk Masks sold: 10,000+]

The Spider Woman never imagined that a livestream mishap would have her working her sewing machine until it smoked.

*

In just three short months, Lan Ding had beaten countless ghosts and monsters on camera and become famous. The word spread throughout the Otherworld: If you hate someone, send them to Lan Ding's livestream!

Lan Ding was now on the road to infamy, with no turning back. More and more guests wanted to eat him, and each one got beaten more badly than the last, until the livestream welcomed the master of the Otherworld: Lord Bai Gui, younger brother of the ancient divine beast Bai Xi. He had a distinctly unusual way of wanting to eat Lan Ding.

"This nail clipper is compact and lightweight, a must-have for home or travel. Let's have Lord Bai Gui demonstrate... Lord Bai Gui, what are you doing? Hey, let go of me, mmph..."

All the ghosts and monsters: Ooh! A live kiss! We love to see it!

Bai Gui held the breathless Lan Ding. "Sorry, the streamer can't go on. I'll go take care of him. The product is on link number one, and the higher the sales, the more perks you get."

The Otherworld's internet crashed.

Lan Ding: "I'm done! I'm staying home!"

Bai Gui: "Stay at my place, then. We can livestream from home~"

Theme: Promoting products is no problem, but dating is too much trouble.