The God Who Couldn’t Lift His Divine Sword (Western Fantasy)

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God bottom x human top

What were the gods of the old age like?

"Probably... compassionate toward all living things?" Fita answered vaguely.

"So that's why so many people want to call you Father?" Ilmyusin took the candy from Fita's mouth.

"No, it's just that they feel such overwhelming... fatherly love from me." Fita clasped his hands to his chest, looking deeply compassionate.

"?"

"So call me Daddy." Fita's expression turned solemn.

Then a gigantic staff smacked him on the head.

Ilmyusin put the candy back in Fita's mouth. "But I guarantee that a god wouldn't use magic to aid digestion just because he wants to eat something delicious, get pinned down by his own divine sword in a fight, or... be buried in the earth and nearly suffocate to death."

Fita protested, "Digging me out of the ground used up every bit of luck you've got in your entire life."

"Strictly speaking, I didn't dig you out. I was just a poor magician trying to heal you, and you ungrateful rascal nearly bit my finger off," Ilmyusin corrected him.

"But I am omniscient and omnipotent," Fita insisted.

"Yes, a god who knows every school of magic but can't cast even the simplest household spell," Ilmyusin pointed out.

"The new gods acknowledge my equal status," Fita said solemnly.

"Right, after you overturned more than ten temples," Ilmyusin prompted, trying to jog Fita's memory.

"My bloodline is noble!" Fita tried once again to prove himself.

"Yes, yes. Apart from that one, only you have such noble... Wait, gods have bloodlines?" Ilmyusin stopped himself.

Fita suddenly understood. "Oh, that's how humans see it..."

"Mm." Ilmyusin nodded.

"Let's change the subject, then." Fita waved his hand dismissively.

The red-haired god of the old age rested his chin in his hand, watching the human magician beside him, whose eyes seemed to hold the ocean. He smiled brightly. "But I love humanity."

"Especially the most special human of all." His pale fingers dangled an amber-colored candy, supported by nothing but a single stick, in front of the magician.

Ilmyusin clasped Fita's wrist and placed his other hand over his chest, bowing to the ancient god. "Then tell me, Your Divinity, are you ready to live in the age of humanity?"

"Of course. I've been ready for a long, long time." Using Ilmyusin's grip on his wrist to draw closer, Fita continued, "It's going to be a very, very long story."

Not everyone in this world is gay. Many details are my own inventions.

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Theme: Even in an unfamiliar place, you should live well