This Immortal Palace Is a Hospital!

My new novel next door, Eastwind Escort Agency: Mission Accomplished!, is now underway.

[This novel is complete. I’ll continue polishing it, correcting typos and awkward phrasing, revising some of the timeline, and adding content. Bonus chapters will be updated from time to time.]

Blurb:

Xi Yu and his group transmigrated.

At the entrance to a modern hospital surrounded by forest, Xi Yu and the others stared at one another in bewilderment.

Xi Yu: What the hell is this place? I only went to sleep!

Coworker: Am I hallucinating? Did anyone from psychiatry come with us?

Hospital System: Congratulations, medical staff! You have successfully bound yourselves to this hospital!

Hospital System: Please work hard to make this hospital thrive!

Xi Yu and the others took off running. Oh my god! Did we just run into ghosts?!

Later, paved roads ran through Mount Bugui, where nobody had once dared to venture, and lights shone along both sides of every road.

Whenever visitors passed through, the villagers would say, “There are immortals on Mount Bugui. They treat the sick and save lives, and their remedies always work.”

Xi Yu and the others: Please don’t put us on a pedestal, thanks!!!

…

Hospital System: The medical school behind the hospital is under construction. 89% complete.

In just six months, a college rose on the mountain behind Mount Bugui. It was called the Medical School.

Xi Yu and the others: We’re done for. We’ll never live down this immortal reputation now.

…

In later years, a legend spread through the Yuguo kingdom: a celestial palace had appeared out of nowhere on Mount Bugui.

The immortals in the palace wore white and treated the sick, saving lives.

Eventually, the palace’s disciples spread across the land.

Whenever they heard the words “celestial palace,”

“That isn’t a celestial palace, and we aren’t immortals.”

“The place you call a celestial palace is a hospital. We’re simply doctors who treat the sick and save lives.”

Reader’s Guide:

1. Every medical worker is a protagonist. This is an ensemble story.

2. Some illnesses in the story are based on the author’s research on Baidu and in medical books; other details are made up by the author.

3. Do not imitate anything in this story. If you get sick, seek medical care promptly.

Coming Soon 1

Working at a Hospital Is Just the Best!!!

It was an ordinary night shift. At five in the morning, Peng Huixiao was woken by a call from a nurse.

Peng Huixiao got up and went to the hospital with her coworkers. The place was completely empty.

Was this… a haunting?

[Welcome to Utopia Hospital. Here, there is no crushing workload, difficult patients, or dangerous hospital disputes.]

[Utopia Hospital will protect your medical ideals.]

Doctors: Ahhh… I must be losing my mind.

Nurses: I must be hallucinating from too many night shifts.

The medical staff braced themselves for a brutally harsh life.

But then

They worked two days on and five days off.

The patients were exceptionally well-behaved.

They could even customize their own dorm rooms.

…

Just as the System had promised, this was a place where medicine was at its purest. The medical staff only had to treat the sick and save lives.

Peng Huixiao was close to tears. System! Why didn’t you show up sooner?

Medical staff: Do you have any idea how miserable our lives were before?

What’s not to like?

Working at this hospital is just the best!

Until one night, Peng Huixiao received a special patient.

“Hello. What’s your name? Where does it hurt?”

“I’m your family member, Xie Fanze.”

Xie Fanze held out his hand. “I’m here to take you all home.”

Peng Huixiao, an orphan, silently typed with a blank expression

The patient’s condition is serious and falls outside this department’s scope. Transferring to neurology for treatment.

…

August 2056.

All medical workers around the world vanished. Only a gate remained at the site of the old hospital.

It read: All illnesses cured, honest service for all.

A banner read: Utopia Hospital.

Every patient seeking treatment at the hospital had to take a large-scale hospital admission assessment. Only those who earned “medical insurance” points could exchange them for a chance to receive treatment at the hospital.

[Congratulations, patient. You are now eligible to receive treatment at a hospital. Matching you with a suitable hospital now,]

[We wish you freedom from illness, safety, and happiness.]

“This is a hospital where the sick plead for a cure, and a paradise where medical staff come to work.”

Coming Soon 2

Also known as: Class 3-A’s Teachers and Students Are Still Number One After Transmigrating to the Cultivation World

Blurb:

After their college entrance exams, all the teachers and students of Class 3-A at Chenxin High School celebrated wildly at a party and got completely drunk.

When they woke up, they had inherited a cultivation sect that had been abandoned for years, and each gained a different ability.

Teachers: Damn it, my bonus!

Students: My vacation! My college life!

When they first received a mission from the System, the teachers and students had been cultivating for barely a year. They gritted their teeth and headed to the mission site.

A flying sword race, where the record had stood for decades.

The race began. The contestants summoned their swords and shot off the starting line with a whoosh.

Class monitor Lan Yihan kept a steady pace, gesturing in the air and muttering as his mind raced.

“Given that the distance is 100 kilometers and the resistance is 7, we’ll have to maintain a flight speed of… to finish within the record time…”

In the insect-catching contest

Other cultivators: Why are these insects so hard to catch?!

Math whiz Zhuo Ran, excited: Huh! We can calculate their flight paths!

When beasts invaded a town

Other cultivators flew through the air on their swords, trying to catch people. After being hit by several balls, they collapsed to the ground, twitching all over.

Physics whiz Ouyang Qin narrowed her eyes. “Is that… a positive-negative electron collision?”

The Science Sect’s disciples became famous across the continent. Legend had it there was no problem they couldn’t solve.

Soon, visitors crowded outside the Science Sect’s gates.

Rogue cultivator: Are you still taking disciples?

Elder from another sect: Could I come study and exchange ideas with your sect?

Disciples from other sects: I really want to transfer to the Cultivation Sect!

Meanwhile, the students of the Cultivation Sect were taking an exam

Class monitor Zhuo Ran scratched his head. “Damn, flying back and forth on a sword is such a pain. How am I supposed to calculate acceleration?”

Physics class representative Zheng Ling: “The teacher really keeps up with current events. The direction of the demonic energy’s current! Same old stuff in a new wrapper… Huh? No, I got it wrong again!”

All-subjects ace Liming scowled. “The math teacher actually put university-level calculus on the exam… I don’t even know what this problem is testing!”

Teachers (smiling): The Science Sect’s disciples fear only one thing: the boss!

Coming Soon 2

There Are No Blood Pressure Pills Here!

Yuheng City First Municipal Hospital is the best hospital in the area, and also the one with the highest turnover rate.

Ge Xuan is a nurse about to quit. After finishing her last night shift, she is at home, just about to fall asleep.

[Welcome, new player, to the survival game.]

[Welcome to Cruise Ship Carnival.]

[Survive as long as you can.]

Ge Xuan irritably rolls over and goes back to sleep.

Only when the racket outside refuses to stop does Ge Xuan sit up, her hair a mess and her expression dark. She storms out the door and comes face-to-face with a snarling, blue-faced monster.

Ge Xuan yells, “What are you making all that noise for? Are you crazy? It’s the middle of the night! Can’t a person get any sleep?”

The monster trying to scare the players flees, terrified by the resentment radiating from Ge Xuan.

The other players, looking utterly bedraggled: What the hell???

Ge Xuan’s motto:

If you can live, live. If you can’t, die. My life’s a mess anyway.

But in the survival game, whenever Ge Xuan thinks all hope is lost and gets ready to laugh and give up,

A pair of hands always pulls her forward.

Ge Xuan smiles at Xu Jia, who is standing before her in a pitiful state.

Xu Jia clutches her hand and refuses to let go.

His voice trembles, his eyes bloodshot.

“Ge Xuan… don’t die here.”

“I… can’t lose you again.”

[Fake-smiling, irritable, sharp-tongued heroine x arrogant, affection-starved, loyal-dog hero]

[Reader’s Guide:

1. This novel is exactly what the title promises. The story will raise your blood pressure, and the author doesn’t have enough blood pressure medication to go around, so it will be provided periodically.

2. The protagonists often act crazy, and the heroine and hero bicker all the time.]

Theme: Promote science education and oppose superstition.