Straightforward, goofy vampire bottom x tsundere, secretly passionate Fusang Tree top
The variety show "Whose Hometown Is the Most Beautiful?" is about to be livestreamed across the Three Realms, with one guest and one unique activity per realm. Before netizens from the Three Realms could even start promoting their hometowns, the guest lineup nearly killed them with shock.
There are four guests. Three have openly declared that they can't stand one another, and then there's An Qiaozhi, director of the Otherworld Administration Bureau, from Tanggu, a place beyond the Three Realms.
It seemed they'd finally found someone they could all complain about, and online posts piled up:
They demanded he get out of Tanggu and give up control of the passage between the Three Realms. They also accused him of bullying his subordinates, withholding bonuses, spreading rumors everywhere, and being lazy and greedy.
He's a bloodsucking bastard who endangers the safety of the Three Realms.
An Qiaozhi: "?"
He'd only just gotten online this year, and the phones of the modern age had already shocked him. This thing could not only insult people, but spread rumors too!
He tapped and poked at the screen, only to like a whole string of hate comments.
Netizens: "?"
On the show:
While trying out rural life and farming in the human realm, Shennong asked him, "This show is about the Three Realms. Where are you from?"
An Qiaozhi answered sincerely, "The outside world."
The other three guests, who had been getting along harmoniously: "?"
*
The divine realm held an architecture competition, with a nine-digit prize for first place. An Qiaozhi signed up without hesitation. The Divine Lord thought of Tanggu's dilapidated house and shook his head disapprovingly.
But An Qiaozhi built a dreamlike courtyard, leaving the same old glittering gold designs in the dust.
*
After he won the prize, the King of the Underworld secretly followed An Qiaozhi to Tanggu with a camera. Before the viewers could even react to how desolate Tanggu was, they heard An Qiaozhi tell his clan members in front of the ramshackle house, "Eight hundred years have passed. I never gave up on you."
The comments exploded: [Fire this useless leader who never does any work! I want An Qiaozhi!]
Early that morning, Tanggu shot to the top of the trending topics across the Three Realms.
What the cameras didn't catch was his next line: "Now that Tanggu has internet, it's your turn to support me!"
Off camera, a little sprout poked out of a small coffin and gently touched An Qiaozhi's palm.
It also ate the immortal herbs Shennong and the King of the Underworld had suddenly brought over, and beat up the Divine Lord for trying to give An Qiaozhi a new coffin.
An Qiaozhi sighed, then posted:
"My bed came to life and keeps getting handsy with me. What should I do? Waiting online, urgent!"
That night, An Qiaozhi, who didn't know how to post anonymously, also became a trending topic.
Note: The Xiling Ghost is based on the Classic of Mountains and Seas. In other words, it's a vampire.
This is an edgy work, so please don't hate on it if it's not your thing.
Posted June 30
Revised September 2
Theme: Strive ceaselessly for self-improvement
