I, Anya's Older Sister, Have the Power to Suddenly Become Her Junior

I'm ten years old, and I came from the same laboratory as Anya.

But my ability is a technique from the Jujutsu world. To activate it, I have to shout out a form of address, like Dad, Mom, or an older brother or sister.

I don't know why a technique that seems completely out of place in the Jujutsu world appeared in me. But then again, if you ask me, it's a side effect of the worlds merging into chaos.

The lab couldn't explain my ability either. To me, it was embarrassing, ridiculous, and awkward.

I mean, I was the one who felt awkward.

Having superpowers is great and all, but this technique is completely useless, isn't it? And the worlds of Bungo Stray Dogs, Kuroko's Basketball, and The Disastrous Life of Saiki K. have all merged too! What chance does an ordinary elementary school student have of surviving against the gods of this world? I'd say zero percent. Definitely zero percent, right?!

In danger? Call Dad.

In danger? Call Mom.

In danger? Call Big Brother.

In danger? Call Big Sister.

Thank you, my ability, for giving an orphan countless family members.

Bonus scene:

Enemy: "Ah, you're...! You're my family! My only family!"

Me: ...

Me: That's right. I'm your one and only family.

Me at the start: What is this ability even for?! It's completely useless!

Me now: Thank you, God. This ability is amazing. Thank you.

Content warnings:

No CP, family-oriented, aiming for a lighthearted tone.

Comedy. The protagonist claims relatives everywhere, but the ability doesn't work on certain people, though it still has some effect (gestures).

I'm really trying to make this funny!

A brainless, adored-by-everyone story (I swear).

Written on a whim!

Theme: Love?