The Matchmaker's Stand-In Hu Lai's Diary II

My lord, what should we do if we can't tie the red threads together?

Are you an idiot or what?

Tie the two red threads into a double-coin knot, a button knot, a pipa knot, a brocade ball knot, a cross knot, an auspicious knot, a myriad-character knot, a panchang knot, an algae-well knot, a double-link knot, a butterfly knot, a brocade-pouch knot...

...Then tie two dead knots and sew them shut with needle and thread. Let's see if they still won't join!

My lord, can we really do that?

Hmph!

Let them try coming after me!

There was once a matchmaker god called Hu Lai. He matched people with a single red thread on a whim, pairing demons and monsters with young men, and lovely ladies with wicked ghosts.

He paid no heed to the three realms or the six paths. All he cared about was connecting the red threads. But when you're so unreasonable, everything is bound to go wrong.

He did this day after day, year after year. The heavens and earth were thrown into chaos. The living had no souls and the dead had no spirits, while the gods in the palace suffered terribly.

The other immortals ran around in circles, while he alone was delighted. Then one day, a newcomer arrived and began to investigate Hu Lai carefully.

If no one investigated, life would carry on as usual. But once they did, they uncovered one disaster after another. All because Hu Lai had refused to let the threads of fate break, he had even changed people's destinies.

Never mind the cases of dying and coming back to life. To him, the heavenly laws were mere scraps of paper. Every time he matched people, he forced them together, and a good match turned into a disastrous one.

The scoundrel himself never realized it. Accustomed to doing whatever he pleased, he made a mess of everything, then actually dared to call his work a series of beautiful love stories.

He wrote down each case and thought he had created a fine match. He reviewed every single report, never once considering that a relationship could exist outside the red thread.

He compiled his outrageous deeds into a book, infuriating his successor and making his predecessor turn in his grave. Neither could match the book that became a cautionary tale.

Theme: A record of Hu Lai's misdeeds, a short story for vegetarians