(An Absolutely Thrilling Showbiz Novel)

In the entertainment industry, Cheng Fei is famous for being a beautiful wooden doll. All she has going for her is her face. She is terrible with words, stammers when she speaks, has astonishingly poor social skills, and offends people every time she opens her mouth. Her haters hope she’ll keep talking herself into trouble, while her fans wish someone would poison her mute. Until one day, Cheng Fei really does lose her voice. When she joins a dating show, she faces the Best Actor, who has never been involved in a single scandal, and says, "(A very flirtatious line.)" The Best Actor, who always wears an icy expression, turns red to the tips of his ears and flees in a panic. After wrapping up her TV drama, Cheng Fei posts on Weibo: "[A thought-provoking and deeply moving essay.]" It sets off a wave of reposts across the internet. Everyone praises her for having finally come into her own, calling her a rare celebrity with real insight. Even when she goes to the market, she only has to face the stingiest pork seller and say, "(A few razor-sharp haggling lines.)" He gives her the freshest pork at a 10% price, practically placing it in her hands. A passerby films the whole thing, and netizens say they’ve learned her haggling tricks. Cheng Fei: ...I didn't even open my mouth. What did you learn? Recently, a special correspondent interviewed Cheng Fei, the renowned actress, thinker, stand-up comedy genius, and song queen. Faced with the reporter, Cheng Fei can only: "(Deliver an incredibly moving speech and a few polite platitudes.)" The reporter bursts into tears. "Ms. Cheng is so humble! Our film industry only produces a people's artist with such profound ideas as you once in a hundred years!" The whole room erupts in thunderous applause! Theme: Live freely and do as you please