Please Don't Ship NPCs in Battle Games

[This story is officially complete! If you're interested, check out my upcoming work. Love you~] Replying to every player who sends a letter is one of the basic duties of a good NPC. Player [Little Bear□□] asks: Do you prefer eating mermaid skulls or longhorn beetle scales? Wen Nan: I like cookies. Player [Quit If I Don't Get a Divine Weapon] asks: Why doesn't your dungeon drop platinum ivory? Wen Nan: There are no such organs. Player [California Lamppost] asks: Can I cross swords with you? Wen Nan: I don't know how to use a sword. Player [Please Just Write Back to Me]: Can you and the Holy Son end up together in this life? Wen Nan: ... There are also a few questions from the land of the living. Player [Bow Before Bed] asks: What do you usually do? Wen Nan carefully writes: In the morning, I go to the forest to enjoy the scenery. At noon, I nap by the lake. In the afternoon, I take a walk on the mountaintop, then go home to read. Player [Bow Before Bed] follows up: Don't you sleep with the Elf King at night? Wen Nan: ... Player [Bow Before Bed] follows up: You could sleep with our Pope, too. Want to think about it? Wen Nan: ? Wen Nan is an NPC who has held the number one spot on the Players' Favorite NPC of the Year list for years. But he has one tiny little, tiny little worry. The players are wonderful in every way, except that they're especially interested in his love life. Every time he hears about a new relationship, he has to explain it to the Demon King. At first, it was his brain that took a beating. Later, not only his brain, but his back, too. Theme: Love is beautiful