When a Goofy Top Falls Into a Crematorium Romance [Quick Transmigration]

[Complete. Thank you for supporting the official release! Check out my upcoming novel, “I Won Over the No-CP Male Lead [Book Transmigration]”] He Heng transmigrated into the role of a scumbag seme in several “chasing your wife to the crematorium” stories: An Alpha who married an Omega for power, then abandoned him after having his way; A regent who imprisoned the emperor, then staged a coup; A disciple who broke his master’s path of ruthless cultivation, then made him a laughingstock. System: The protagonists’ corruption levels in every world have reached unprecedented heights. Bring their corruption levels down. If you fail, you’ll be punished by having your bones ground to dust. He Heng: Why pick me? System: Dear, we detected that your happiness levels are very high, so you’re a great fit for this task. He Heng: Since when are people not allowed to be happy? · World One: He Heng had just transmigrated as a scumbag Alpha when the protagonist stood at the edge of a rooftop, looking utterly hopeless and ready to end his life. He Heng: “Get down.” The protagonist: “There’s nothing left for us to talk about.” He had just lifted one leg when He Heng shouted, “I’m pregnant with your child! How can you bear to abandon the two of us?!” The onlookers stared at him in shock. The protagonist: “…” Suddenly, he didn’t feel like jumping anymore. · World Two: The day after He Heng saw the emperor whom “he” had imprisoned in the palace and humiliated in every way, he fell off his horse while out hunting. The fall left the powerful regent “amnesiac.” In his “amnesia,” he forgot everyone except the emperor. Late that night, the emperor saw the man who had once stopped at nothing for power rush over and wrap his arms around his waist, looking deeply devoted and sounding wounded. “You don’t want me anymore? Why did you leave me all alone?” The emperor: “…” Did he hit his head when he fell? · World Three: He Heng transmigrated as the scumbag disciple who had broken his aloof master’s path of ruthless cultivation, then abandoned him. But when everyone in the cultivation world condemned his master and pointed fingers at him, He Heng suddenly appeared and gave them all a sound thrashing. Then he knelt before his sickly, beautiful master and declared in a clear, steady voice: “Master, who broke your path of ruthless cultivation? I’ll go kill him and give you a show.” Looking at his former rebellious disciple kneeling before him and spouting nonsense, the protagonist’s usually cool face developed a rare crack in its composure. “…” Am I supposed to kill myself? · World Four: [“Greedy Human Scum” seme x blind little merfolk] Ancient setting · [Fake pursuit of his wife, real comedy; carefree, dramatic seme x a pitiful uke who’s always on the verge of becoming corrupted but can never quite snap, seemingly stubborn but actually soft and sweet] Reading guide: 1. One-on-one, happy ending; the uke is the same person in every world. 2. Both are each other’s first. The uke never had feelings for the original host. 3. They dote on each other (highlighted)! Readers with extreme character loyalties, please stay away. Blurb archived on 2021/04/27 ★ Upcoming novel: “I Won Over the No-CP Male Lead [Book Transmigration]” Fixed Nitrogen’s seme-focused story ★ Zhe Fengdu transmigrated into an 18+ cultivation novel and became the sinister, ruthless Demon Lord seme, feared throughout the Three Realms. The protagonist uke, the immortal Lin’an, was as ethereal as an exiled immortal and possessed extraordinary talent. Though he was the greatest cultivator in the world, he was also an incurable romantic. He was deeply in love with Zhe Fengdu, spent night after night entangled with him, and the two had tried out every famous spot in the Three Realms and every kind of difficult position. But just as Zhe Fengdu transmigrated, the immortal Lin’an led the righteous cultivators in an assault on the Demon City. With a cold expression and a sword in hand, the immortal stood before his door. “You and I are on opposite sides of good and evil!” Zhe Fengdu: He obviously likes me, but insists on pretending to hate me. Love is in his heart, but he can’t say it aloud. I get it. Though the story was a little different from the original, Zhe Fengdu wasn’t worried in the slightest. To the shock of all his subordinates, he took the immortal’s hand and snatched away his sword. “Don’t be jealous of those little demons. There’s nothing between us.” Everyone present froze like statues: … · Later, when the immortal held his sword to Zhe Fengdu’s neck, his subordinates tensed, ready to attack. But Zhe Fengdu smiled and raised a hand to stop them. Zhe Fengdu: What do they know? Fighting means affection, scolding means love. He’s got a sword to my neck. How much more could he possibly like me? The next moment, the immortal Lin’an saw the Demon Lord, a sword still pressed to his neck, smile serenely in front of everyone. “What are you panicking for? How could he ever bear to hurt me?” The immortal Lin’an: ??? · Zhe Fengdu acted as he pleased, secure in the knowledge that he was the protagonist, and thrived throughout the Three Realms. Under his leadership, the Demon Realm grew more prosperous by the day… Then, much later, a bolt of heavenly lightning struck, and a dream visited him in the night. Only then did Zhe Fengdu realize that he had transmigrated into a no-CP cultivation novel called “One Sword to Ascend to God.” In the original, the male lead, the immortal Lin’an, broke through his mortal limitations, survived his tribulation, became an immortal, and ultimately killed the great villain, Zhe Fengdu, on the spot. The immortal’s behavior at the beginning had followed the original story exactly. The book Zhe Fengdu had read and always assumed was the original was actually a wildly unfaithful fanfic of “One Sword to Ascend to God.” He’d mistaken fanfiction for the original, and the plot had already gone completely off the rails… Zhe Fengdu jolted awake from his dream, still trying to sort out his thoughts, when he heard the person beside him murmur in his sleep. The immortal Lin’an, who was supposed to be cold-hearted in the original, had flushed cheeks and a sore waist and weak legs. The immortal nestled into his arms and said softly, “The pillar at the top of the main hall is crooked. Go fix it tomorrow.” Zhe Fengdu wrapped his arms around him. “All right.” What else could he do now? He could only keep going down this road to the very end. ★ Completed novel in my column: “The System Forces Me to Live Off My Lover [Quick Transmigration]” ★ Theme: Joining hands to create a better future