The Amazing Journey of Dazai the Cat

[Come check out my profile and upcoming stories, all about Dazai: Dazai x2, Dazai x4, where Dazai splits into multiple selves! Human Disqualification, Meow, where a kitten Dazai gets together with an ability! Tentacles x Dazai, isn't that tempting enough? (Puppy eyes)] Story description: One day, Dazai wakes up as a kitten, one that was born only a little while ago, and has been abandoned on the street. Staring at his tiny paws, the frail, adorable kitten is left reeling in the wind. The wind in Yokohama is a little too cold for a cat... Just as he thinks he'll starve to death on the street in the body of a kitten, a calico cat appears. After returning to the past and being taken in by the Armed Detective Agency, Dazai the cat enjoys a life of luxury, then realizes something is off. Hm? Is this a new member of the Armed Detective Agency? Dazai the cat's pupils shake with shock. There's another me in this world? Why isn't the plot going the way I remember? *An original alternate timeline, with some differences from the original. Nothing major. *Dazai the cat has no pairing. The side pairing is Boss Dazai x Fyodor (in the extras only). *Please forgive any out-of-character moments. … Upcoming: Human Disqualification, Meow Description: What if No Longer Human became a cat? No Longer Human, the nullification ability, suddenly develops a consciousness of its own. It even separates from its host and becomes an independent being. Sounds great. But... it only turns into a cat. What can a cat do? Apart from knocking over wine glasses, knocking over files, becoming a master of cleaning desks, walking over people's chests in the middle of the night and pinning them down in nightmares, and wreaking havoc while still being adored by countless people, what else can it do? The cat doesn't know. The cat is confused. The cat decides to find itself a grand ideal. The Bandage Freak has a headache. His ability has suddenly stopped obeying him. He never expected it to turn into a cat that attacks him with kitty punches. What's the point of a cat beyond being cute? Keeping one is an incredible hassle. But though he complains, he and the cat spend a long time bickering and making up. Until one day, when he returns from a leisurely business trip, a crowd suddenly surrounds him, staring intently. "Your cat turned into a human... and usurped the Mafia boss's position!" The Bandage Freak: ??? "It says it wants to liberate all the abilities in the world." "It also says you have to sleep with it." #NoLongerHumanHasGoneMad# Little scene: In the middle of a fight... "Rashomon!" "Corruption!" A certain Dazai falls into thought, pulls a cat out of his pocket, and throws it. "Look at the cat!" Upcoming: After All My Secret Identities Get Bad Endings, I'm Forced to Mourn Myself Nishimiya Tsukihi once bound himself to a System and created countless secret identities, causing all kinds of trouble. Just as he is about to retire after a job well done, his System suddenly disappears, and the secret identities playing his friends and family start exposing themselves and dying in accidents one after another. In an instant, he goes from everyone's beloved to an ill-fated loner. Nishimiya Tsukihi: Am I really that miserable? I just want to report that lousy System to the consumer association. But he still has to act as their friend and relative, arrange the secret identities' funerals himself, and face the countless pitying, affectionate gazes... Nishimiya Tsukihi closes his eyes. Funerals, funerals, funerals. He grits his teeth and mourns himself. After finishing his own eulogy, Nishimiya Tsukihi tearfully accepts the empires his secret identities built and inherits his own estate from himself. The wealth earned by his "older brother," a magician who toured the world, is easy enough to explain. At least it was earned openly. The salary his "best friend" saved as an editor by struggling to chase down late manuscripts is also earned honestly. But this... He looks at the secret identity of a distillery boss he created on a whim years ago and falls into thought. This isn't the kind of inheritance he should accept. Everyone knows Nishimiya Tsukihi has several very real relationships with friends and family, as well as a very fake romantic relationship. Nishimiya Tsukihi, however, thinks romance is just something to play around with while the System is there, then leave behind. Now the System really has left first. With the people closest to him constantly watching, it'll be easy for them to catch on to his fake grieving. So Tsukihi gives it his all and cries once. "For your sake, let's break up." Otherwise, he really won't be able to keep up the act! Who could have guessed that Dazai, who usually isn't all that clingy, would suddenly take his hand, his eyes filled with genuine emotion? "I'll never give up on you." Tsukihi: ??? Someone save me!!! Little scene one: Dazai (starry-eyed): "Quick, slap the ill-fated loner buff onto me!" Little scene two: When Nishimiya Tsukihi isn't paying attention, he accidentally reveals some habits that only his secret identities have. He wails inwardly that his cover is blown, his cover is blown... But then... "Waaah, Tsukihi is so pitiful. He's become just like them..." Theme: Even tiny paws can have great power. Cats warm people's hearts.