I Conquered the Cultivation World with Versailles-Style Boasting

[This novel will be available to read for free starting September 11. There will be a 10,000-character chapter and a red-envelope giveaway that day. I hope you'll keep supporting it!]

In his previous life, Xie An was the pampered heir to a wealthy family. He owned eighteen luxury villas, and whenever he unlocked his phone, a dozen notifications would chime, each announcing that a million yuan had arrived in his Alipay account.

Whenever that happened, he could only look apologetic and say, "Sorry for disturbing everyone. It's the latest phone, and I'm not very good with it, so I don't know how to silence it." His showboating brought down bad karma, and he slipped on dog poop and died on his way out, only to transmigrate.

When he woke up, he had transmigrated into a web novel on Qidian as the villainous, supremely gifted young sect master. The sect master's role in the story was as follows:

1. Work hard to level up in the race to become the strongest under heaven, then get face-slapped by the male lead.

2. Level up, then get face-slapped by the male lead.

3. Level up, get face-slapped by the male lead, get so furious he goes into qi deviation, and then kick the bucket.

So this was how Zhou Yu had been angered to death by Zhuge Liang. Xie An had barely finished lamenting when a ding rang in his mind. "Dear Host, the Versailles System is at your service. Our motto is to annoy other people to death by showing off. The angrier they get, the faster you level up!"

Xie An: ?

Isn't this right in my area of expertise?

He kicks the scum male lead, punches the white lotus, and forgets all that nonsense about being the strongest under heaven. One swish of a dragon's tail and you're done for.

And so, the first supremely gifted young cultivator in the cultivation world to ride a dragon out to buy groceries made his grand entrance.

If you're lucky enough to see him, do not approach him to chat. Otherwise, you might hear:

"Oh, sorry, my Jade Emperor's personal ride, Little Golden Dragon, is awfully long. Is it blocking the way? Next time I'll bring that more ordinary qilin instead. Although the qilin's pretty big too. What a bother. I guess next time I'll have to ride the Sword Immortal of Qingmen Mountain out, then."

At that moment, the Sword Immortal of Qingmen Mountain happened to be passing by: ?

"Xie An, it seems your master will have to teach you what it means to respect your elders."

The next day, the familiar market was no longer visited by a man riding a dragon. There was only a poor thing buying groceries while holding his aching waist.

"What are you looking at? I fell off the Sword Immortal yesterday. Have you got one?"

A show-off young master who receives x a master who seems abstinent but is actually a lecher

*A silly, logic-free, bathroom-reading comedy and wish-fulfillment story. If you don't like it, come beat me up.

*Master is the gong, disciple is the shou.

*The gong has a secret identity at first.

Coming soon: A Silly Guy Transmigrates into a Farming Novel, historical farming romance

Synopsis:

Lu Yin transmigrates into a farming novel and becomes a little cabbage, picked up from the fields and unloved by his parents. He never gets enough to eat or wear, and is constantly scolded and kicked.

The System tells Lu Yin that he'll die if he doesn't farm. In return, whenever he runs into trouble, the System will offer him choices and tips to help improve his farming skills.

System: Hello, Host. Start farming immediately, or you'll starve to death. Choose:

[1. Steal seeds from your family's house and plant them]

[2. Trade your labor with someone for seeds]

[3. Search for seeds in the mountains]

Lu Yin: Even if I start farming without stopping this very second, I'll still starve to death. I choose to beg for food!

System: ?

System: Hello, Host. Your younger brother discovered the vegetables you planted and told your parents. Now they say they'll take your vegetables once they're ripe, then kick you. Choose:

[1. Verbally face-slap your scumbag parents and younger brother]

[2. Cut ties with them and ask the county magistrate to judge the case]

[3. Endure the humiliation and bide your time]

Lu Yin: Once the vegetables are ripe, I'll sell them all and buy two chicken drumsticks. I'll eat them one bite at a time right in front of those three beasts, then run away before they can catch me!

System: ??

System: You've wandered to the foot of a mountain and are lodging with a hunter. He was raised by wolves, is very protective of his food, and doesn't want to share the game he's caught with you. What will you do?

[1. Trade the cabbages you grew for meat]

[2. Beg him to give you a small bowl]

[3. Use the little money you have left to buy meat from him]

Lu Yin: Get the pot ready. I'm going to fry up a fragrant, spicy batch of cabbage and make this brat drool. Then he'll beg me to trade!

System: ???

A chaotic shou who never follows the script x a gong who is probably the hunter

Theme: Stay optimistic and determined, and stride boldly toward a new journey