The Qing Dynasty's Greatest Writer

New project: Summoning Players to the Three Kingdoms is complete, with bonus chapters currently updating... Blurb: Ever since he was little, Aisin Gioro Yinsi had been forced to watch all kinds of melodramatic romance dramas in his dreams every night. First came the tangled romances between Da Yuer, Xiao Yuer, Dorgon, and Huang Taiji. Then came the late emperor's passionate love affair with Consort Dong'e. On his tenth birthday, he watched the story of his Khan Ama and a woman who had transmigrated reach its finale. Starting at age eleven, after the premiere of the new drama My Tyrannical Emperor Falls in Love with Me: Yongzheng's Intense Love, he watched every kind of brother-as-hero romance in which the lovers would die for love. Yinsi saw through the ways of the world and decided to become a writing machine without feelings. He would publish books! He would share the poisonously awful plots he'd endured, so people all over the world could experience what it was like to be force-fed a story so terrible they couldn't put it down and had to keep reading through their tears. A thousand years later, historians had this to say about Aisin Gioro Yinsi: "He was the first bestselling author. Despite having the exceptional literary talent to write history books and biographies, he became a prince and the first originator of melodramatic novels in our country's history." "Kangxi scolded him for neglecting his proper duties, but secretly kept up with his latest chapters!" "During the struggle among the nine princes for the throne, Yinsi was caught up in the fallout and stopped updating. When he went on hiatus, it felt like the sky had fallen..." "His imagination broadened the horizons of future generations, and his values were even more toxic than his plots!" "His greatest contribution was single-handedly breaking the Qing Dynasty's literary inquisition!" A goofy, lively story full of chaos and commotion. A quick note to head off any concerns: This is a one-on-one romance. Although Xiaoba's mind has been thoroughly corrupted, he is fundamentally a straight, proper gentleman. By 'not straight,' I mean things like pedophilia or incest. I'll explain those separately because Xiaoba has watched so many dramas that he's seen incestuous fanfiction about himself and his brothers, which is a very strange experience when you're one of the people involved. Most Qing princes married in their teens, while Xiaoba married after turning eighteen, so there is no underage romance. The romance is a small part of the story and serves the plot. His wife is the historical Eighth Princess Consort. [Announcement] If chapters 92 and 99 seem to have repeated text, refresh the page to see the latest version! Three bonus chapters have been added to chapter 92. Coming soon: A Fourth Calamity story, written for the adorable Shu Han crew, including Chancellor Zhuge, Zhao Yun, Guan Yu, and Zhang Fei! Liu Bei's Three Kingdoms Farm: Liu Bei is an NPC in a Three Kingdoms-themed farming simulation game. He knows he is in a game, and his character is based on a historical figure who became an emperor. One stormy night, he opened his eyes and found himself in a place called Liu Family Village. Liu Bei suddenly understood: The game must have been wiped and restarted, with a new map! He remembered his mission and got to work doing what a guide NPC should do: teaching the players how to farm... #Liu Bei's Three Kingdoms Farm, Open Beta Begins# #Plant crops, water them, fertilize, weed, and harvest. Enjoy the scenery of a fully immersive countryside and experience the clear, natural charm of ancient Huaxia# From a game nobody cared about to a sensation across the star net, it offered people a way to escape the land of the Han, where starving refugees filled the countryside, and enjoy the delights of farming and running a business in a paradise in another world. #Three Kingdoms Conquest Mode Unlocked# #Protect the paradise and unify the Han realm# Players: Awoooo! There are way too many stories about Cao Wei and Eastern Wu! Boss Cao is in everything Three Kingdoms-related. Meanwhile, Shu Han, Liu Bei's faction, is either getting defeated or on its way to being wiped out. Shu Han is starving! For Chancellor Zhuge, charge! Players: We have just one wish, Big Brother Zilong: please let us sleep with you! Players: Lord Guan! Lord Guan! Your magnificent beard is perfect for a commemorative photo! This is the mint-scented shampoo I developed. It'll take care of your beard. And here's some rose-scented conditioner! Players: Brother Zhang Fei is so handsome! o(*////▽////*)q I want to make a male character and go bathe outdoors with him! Zhao Yun: ... Guan Yu: ... Zhang Fei: ...? Liu Bei: Wait, don't do anything crazy! w(?Д?)w Players: My lord, just wait. We'll collect all the famous people of the Three Kingdoms for you. If we can't convince them to come, we'll kidnap them! Players: Little Conqueror Sun Ce, Handsome Commander Zhou Yu, we won't leave a single one behind. Players: Um, heh heh, my lord, we want to go tease Cao Cao. Young, fresh-faced Cao Cao is so tempting and easy to fool (slurp). What do you think...? Liu Bei: This is... a farming... game... Zhuge Liang's eyes shone as he said, "My lord is a great hero. You will keep the people of the realm from becoming displaced, and make sure they have enough to eat and drink. This is about far more than farming! Please do not underestimate yourself, my lord. Liang will follow you to the death!" Liu Bei was so moved that tears streamed down his face. He wrapped his arms around Zhuge Liang. "Waaah, Kongming is my sweetest little angel." Players (shocked): We hadn't even come to our senses, and my lord had already lured Zhuge Liang over! Amazing, my lord! Completed works: [Qing] If I Don't Work Hard, I'll Be Forced to Inherit the Throne If I Don't Dress as a Woman, the Han Dynasty Will Fall! A Max-Level Diao Chan Transmigrates to the Three Kingdoms Through the Willow Trees, I See a Ghost Again [Three Kingdoms] They All Want to Cling to Me [Crossover] Click the author's profile for more completed works! Theme: Don't give in to fate. Live in the present and be yourself. I define my own life.