Lay Reader, There's a Ghost Behind You

Two ghost-catching masters live at No. 444 Black Alley: one is a bald lecher, the other a handsome, fair-faced fellow.

These two catch ghosts cheaply and efficiently, and get the job done every time. Everyone knows their reputation, and everyone wants to beat them up.

Unfortunately, one is a foul-mouthed chatterbox who talks a mile a minute, while the other is cold-faced, heavy-handed, and loves hitting people.

A story about a fake monk and a real Daoist teaming up to catch ghosts.

The fake monk used to be the big boss of the underworld, while the real Daoist is a banished immortal.

The real Daoist says he's performing a ritual, but really he's beating up ghosts. The fake monk says he's chanting sutras, but really he's boosting the underworld's revenue.

"Benefactor, your forehead is dark. I'm afraid misfortune is coming your way."

"Bullshit. My hat's dye is running."

"This little monk has a word of wisdom to offer you."

"How fortunate. I have one too."

"Oh? Do tell."

"Get lost."

"Sure thing."

No one knew that the King of Hell, who once held dominion over life and death, had held only one wish in his heart for millions upon millions of years:

"Ah Heng, kiss me. Just give me one kiss, and I'll be a monk for a million years and catch ghosts with you for a million years."

1. A fake monk who talks endlessly and never lifts a finger if he can help it, but can destroy the heavens and earth when he does, is the seme. The upright real Daoist, whose combat strength is off the charts, is the uke.

2. Supernatural, ghosts and monsters, Eastern mythology, a hodgepodge of Buddhism and Daoism.

Theme: A story about the things Buddhism and Daoism can't say to each other