Don't Touch My Balls

Pre-receipt of "Full Attribute Garbled Codes [Unlimited]" and "Why Should I Chop My Fish Head?" [Unlimited]" Click the column to get more pre-orders for you to choose from. Jiang Chengyu was an unlucky 18th-tier artist who finally got spotted by a well-known director. Who would have thought that before the book in his hand was warmed up, his figure would suddenly be out of shape and his belly would get bigger and bigger. Until one day, a liar named Wei Changfeng came to the door and said that he was pregnant. And handed him a card with a few big words printed on it - professional abortion, no deception. Maybe he escaped from some mental hospital. The dead liar is thick-skinned, talks nonsense, and calls himself the Taoist ancestor. He is unreliable in every aspect of his body. Jiang Chengyu is desperate, and after being deceived for a few days, he is actually a little shaken. Ever since he started following the other party, Jiang Chengyu had always encountered some outrageous events that were unimaginable to ordinary people, but he was always solved by this guy in seemingly bizarre ways. This guy seems to be really capable... But why is he still so pregnant? ! —— Jiang Chengyu never thought that one day he would discover the truth. It turns out that Wei Changfeng is really not a liar, and his so-called self-proclaimed "Tao Ancestor" is not something he can just use to brag. A person who even shudders away from monsters does not need a false reputation at all, he himself is even stronger. And her so-called pregnancy was not an accident due to bad luck. It turns out that he is the chosen one, the most special existence. Later... Wei Changfeng, the dignified Taoist ancestor, squatted beside the bed, his claws about to reach out to someone's egg: "Ouch! It's strange to be able to give birth to such a big egg?" Unexpectedly, before he even got close, his whole body was lifted away by a force that was too strong to resist. Jiang Chengyu: "Get out of here, don't touch my balls!" Wei Changfeng: "..." Now and then, he didn't dare to offend Jiang Chengyu now. All the debts incurred must be repaid. It feels good to lie to others for a while, and I chase my wife in the crematorium. CP attributes: Poisonous tongue can fight both sides, novice crying bag, growing type of protector, two-way protection, hugging whose thigh is not hugging? -Pre-received article "Full Attribute Garbled Code [Unlimited]" - When Yu Zhou woke up from a coma, he found that he was trapped in a brand new world. Almost everyone was racking their brains to survive, but Yu Zhou picked up a cub at the beginning, and even went shopping openly in front of those monsters. Passerby 1:... No? ! Is this person a king? How about shopping here and walking the kids? ! Passerby 2: Let me tell you something, this guy is so damn good-looking... The monsters who were forced to watch the parenting program in the dungeon were all dumbfounded. After realizing the contempt from Yu Zhou's behavior, the incompetent and furious monsters collectively rounded their arms in an attempt to save some unwarranted... Face in front of passers-by. Black long straight slit woman holding a brain-breaking hammer A decapitated, maggot-infested muscular man dragging a giant axe Fat nerd with big body smiling and playing with internet cable … Without exception, they all rushed towards Yu Zhou with full firepower. Just when everyone thought that Yu Zhou was certain to die, those copy monsters that were originally showing their teeth and claws were slapped one by one by Yu Zhou in front of everyone. The slapped copy monsters:...? ! ! ! Yu Zhou: You scared the baby. Passerby:? ! What is this? ! ! What is this? ! ! Yu Zhou: Well... It's weaker than expected. Passerby:? Do you call this weak? The frightened people met their thighs, and fell at Yu Zhou's feet one by one, wailing: Boss! Boss, take me with you! Yu Zhou, who was holding the child in his arms, acted as if he hadn't heard anything. He turned around and wandered around in the copy again. ***** As the difficulty of the dungeon increases, more and more people want to team up with Yu Zhou, including Lu Xun. Unlike other people who wanted to hug someone, Lu Xun joined just for Yu Zhou. He thinks Yu Zhou is a great beauty. With the blessing of the setting of punching a little monster, his interest in Yu Zhou has increased several degrees. So he asked Yu Zhou: How are your attribute points allocated? Yu Zhou, who didn't understand why, heard this and handed his hand to Lu Xun with his palm upward: Is this what you are talking about? Passers-by who were planning to copy Yu Zhou's attribute assignment poked their heads out and were stunned after just one glance: No! Boss, why are your attributes so garbled? ! ! ! Lu Xun:... Now it's even more interesting. Reading Guide 1. The natural beauty Shou, who looks cold but is actually three years old in emotional intelligence, is attacked by the crazy beauty who looks like a social butterfly but is actually cold. The two bosses lead the cub, a two-way redemption. 2. On the open palm is everyone's attribute panel. Yu Zhouzhou's attributes are all garbled. (The setting text will be revealed later) —Pre-released article "Why should I chop my fish head with pepper [Unlimited]"—— CP: Hot on the outside and hot on the inside, stupid mermaid shou × cold on the outside and slightly hot on the inside, strong force, beauty attack As a useless little monster in the infinite game, Yu Yu firmly believed that no player would have any ill will towards a beautiful vase like him. Until one day, high-latitude creatures invaded, the human world merged with the entire infinite game world, the program was tampered with, and the monsters in the copy received an instruction almost at the same time: Kill all humans. The monsters who are killed by players every day are extremely excited: Heaven is so reincarnated, who will be spared by heaven! However, just when the attributes of all monsters were enhanced, Yu Yu sadly discovered that his attribute panel had been completely weakened. Even the beauty he is proud of has decreased by 0.1... Yu Yu:? Why? Just when Yu Yu was puzzled, a human who looked like a vase appeared in front of him. He held a spatula in one hand and a pan in the other. He raised his chin towards Yu Yu with an expressionless face: Tonight's dinner will be chopped pepper fish head. Yu Yu:? ? ? No, are you sick? ? Why are you chopping my fish head? Shen Yuan: Because... The fish head with chopped pepper is delicious! Yu Yu: ... God damn delicious! ******* Yu Yu, who was regarded as a reserve by Shen Yuan, seriously doubted that the heaven-defying attributes that were supposed to be added to him were probably stolen by the doge coin. Otherwise, how could he, a mere human being, travel through all the dungeons with a spatula and a pan, and even put them on the table one by one for his boss colleagues who were full of buffs. High-dimensional creatures also have hands that sometimes shake, huh! That must be it! Yu Yu followed Shen Yuan and clenched his fists bitterly, until the other party expressionlessly picked up a piece of iron pot to stew the SSS+ attribute goose. The anger on Yu Yu's face disappeared in an instant. He bit into Shen Yuan's chopsticks and praised it in a dog-like manner: "It's delicious! It's delicious! It's delicious!" Shen Yuan: It's a pity that there are no chopped green onions here, otherwise it would be more delicious. Yu Yu: Yes! There is a copy of Mirror Forest! It's just that it's guarded by a big toad with 4S+ attributes, so it's pretty hard to fight. Shen Yuan: Oh? Try it! No, brother, you are a human being, how can you be more perverted than us monsters? ! ! # Bring your own spatula and cook for me all over the world# #Mermaid was accidentally fed by the boss into a fat-headed fish# #HELP! The boss doesn't want to fatten me up and then chop me up! # Intention: Only love lasts forever