Long ago,
In the Western Regions, the people of ancient Gulan Ting worshiped a divine bird,
and gave it the beautiful name
Phoenix.
The phoenix cries out upon the high ridge.
The parasol trees grow beneath the morning sun.
An ancient creature originally found in The Classic of Mountains and Seas
now soared through the highest heavens.
Everyone was drunk,
but he alone was sober.
When they awoke, the western lands were peaceful once again, just as they had been before.
The legend of the phoenix
once again spread among the people of the West.
Theme:
The angle of entry is very novel. The heroine seems to have a bit of negative energy?
When I read Chapter 3, the heroine is still working overtime... Is the hero her boyfriend? Is it the younger brother? A bit square
The writing is okay, but I think my brother's psychological activities are a lot less.
The heroine used to love dancing, but then she gave it up
If you don't want to talk about that kind of heartache, you can write about it. After all, many readers have things that they have to give up. Em, that feeling is very immersive.
The younger brother is still persisting, in contrast to his older sister
Why didn't you write about the younger brother's mentality, his unruly nature, his anger and distress, and his distressed emotions?
Compare his psychology with that of the heroine
If you write it down, it will become more clear after the heroine goes through it.
And the second female lead? I think it's not too much to spend some time writing about the entangled jealousy in my heart.
In this way, the image of the heroine emerges immediately
Also... Why didn't I see any description of appearance?
Yeah, the angle is very fresh and quite attractive.
But a lot of pen and ink is not enough
It still seems quite interesting
The plot is a bit slow... I can't see anything
Just what Jiang Zi said is wrong. Big generosity
Above, come on, I'm optimistic about you.
The story feels good, but the writing is a bit immature
Although there is only one chapter, I am looking forward to going straight to the copywriting!
The angle of entry is very novel. The heroine seems to have a bit of negative energy? When I read Chapter 3, the heroine is still working overtime... Is the hero her boyfriend? Is it the younger brother? A bit square The writing is okay, but I think my brother's psychological activities are a lot less. The heroine used to love dancing, but then she gave it up If you don't want to talk about that kind of heartache, you can write about it. After all, many readers have things that they have to give up. Em, that feeling is very immersive. The younger brother is still persisting, in contrast to his older sister Why didn't you write about the younger brother's mentality, his unruly nature, his anger and distress, and his distressed emotions? Compare his psychology with that of the heroine If you write it down, it will become more clear after the heroine goes through it. And the second female lead? I think it's not too much to spend some time writing about the entangled jealousy in my heart. In this way, the image of the heroine emerges immediately Also... Why didn't I see any description of appearance? Yeah, the angle is very fresh and quite attractive. But a lot of pen and ink is not enough It still seems quite interesting The plot is a bit slow... I can't see anything Just what Jiang Zi said is wrong. Big generosity Above, come on, I'm optimistic about you.
The story feels good, but the writing is a bit immature
Although there is only one chapter, I am looking forward to going straight to the copywriting!